blogrockinzach

Cap ou pas cap (4)

2011-08-28T19:15:00.001-04:00

夜深了，易成躺在狭窄的板床上发呆。除了上铺偶尔的翻转，只有楼下草地里蛐蛐的叫声在为他打着节奏。他很意外的发现自己并没有因为爷爷的去世而情绪失控，他甚至没有感觉到难过，没有一点想哭的欲望。

其实他已经有几个月没有见到爷爷了。除了偶尔回家一次，这个小小的宿舍和每天晚上躺在这四张木板床上躯壳几乎已经成为了易成的整个世界。虽然这不像他曾经想象的大学，但这懵懂的生活已经夺去了他挣扎的动力。他的每天在起床后的午餐，上课时的报纸，夜宵后的网络论坛，以及睡觉前尸体和尸体之间的扯淡之间循环。他已经成了一具被人操控没有思想没有记忆的木偶，不知道自己从哪里来要到哪里去。有时候他想要大喊，我操你妈！但茫然发现自己不知道“你”到底是谁。有时候他觉得他只是在跟自己过不去，就像是在梦里做爱累的满头大汗以及满地鸡巴毛，醒来却发现顶着鸡巴的只是自己的手。有时候他又他觉得自己在风蚀，一回头甚至能清楚的看到所有一切事物都在风中慢慢剥落。他突然发现自己甚至已经记不起上次见到爷爷时的情景，不禁心底发凉，难道失去一个人是这样的容易吗？谁能知道上次的见面会是最后一次，谁又能想到我竟然什么都不记得了。

爷爷一直身体不好，风湿骨痛，一下雨比天气预报还精准。在易成的记忆里，爷爷总是在病床上接见来宾，当然他也是来宾之一。爷爷的话不多，很少发表意见，给人感觉很随性，但从他的眼中易成总是觉得他不是没有看法。说实话，他对爷爷的了解并不多，现在想起来，他觉得很内疚，但他不知道他们俩谁错了，还是谁都没错。

他没有见过奶奶。爷爷也从来没有提起过任何关于奶奶的事，甚至父亲也三缄其口。他只从母亲那里隐约听到过一些。

爷爷的父亲曾是一名普通的草药医师，而他则算是继承了父亲的职业，成了一个医生。他和奶奶都是知青，被迫响应那个年代特有的要求而来到这个遥远的小城。他们在这个无依无靠的地方得到了病人们的接纳。但是在后来那个不幸的年代里，不知道是谁从哪发现，爷爷的父亲曾经在抗战时医治过一名国民党士兵。再后来发生的事就非常合理自然了。疯狂夹杂嫉妒，奶奶在父亲结婚前吃了安眠药，爷爷得了风湿长期无人医治。

当然这些是母亲的话，有时候易成并不十分相信。他觉得任何的传说都是从事实中被激发而在这样的口口相传中产生的，比如传说中的国母。

易成想的睡不着，起床来到阳台，凉风带着青草和树叶的味道，他闻到了小时候在爷爷家傍晚时分午睡醒来后压抑绝望的味道。小时候的记忆总是很片段，就像是一场蹩脚的电视连续梦，一集一集却并不十分关联；又像是在暗房里看黑白的幻灯片，亮起的时候看到的是模糊的影像，而切片的时候则是长长的黑暗。他感到很低落，夜晚总是让人低落。他仿佛看到迎面吹来凉风在吹走他的记忆。回头看看里面，那三具尸体仍一动不动的躺着，他突然觉得好像闻到了死鸡的腥味一样恶心。他其实是个怀旧的人，有时候总是从自己短短的人生里挖掘出一些腐朽的片段。老大总是对此嗤之以鼻，说你又不是大象，干嘛记得这么多事情，每天活在记忆里你累不累。现在他想，也许是因为自己不是大象而这些是自己仅存的记忆而想要拼命抓住吧。

易成想的头疼，看看天似乎快要亮了，他想，我还是回去看看吧。

The truth seems like a lie

2011-07-04T17:48:00.001-04:00

在我觉得他们错了的时候，他们告诉我是我错了，他们没有错，他们是不会错的。他们告诉我长大了你就会明白了

到我长大的时候我觉得我没有错，他们告诉我其实我没有长大，在我们眼里你永远是孩子

当我不想再做孩子的时候，他们告诉我这样想就是不爱你的母亲，每个人都要爱自己的母亲，要听母亲的话

所以我错了

他们说

Song: Arrested in Shanghai – Rancid

Yeah
They assured me I was guilty but I committed no crime
They said, confessions bring lenience so they put me on the line
So I protest the massacres at the Tiananmen Square
My friends said yo, stay away man, you better not go fucking back there, oh

Watch this!
Would not let me write about my opinions about the state
And the freedom of expression they would never tolerate
And the military secrets that I never did steal
I didn't start no violence, no, and there was nobody that I killed, no

So I have a clear account of all the abuses of power
And the memories of homeland now gone sour
And I only got one weapon, it's so plain for me to see
My only weapon I call... poetry

And I don't even know why
The truth seems like a lie
In my cell there is no sky
When I was arrested in Shanghai

Into wealth and privilege, huh, I was not born
But a devotion to freedom and liberty, I was sworn
So every emotion is studied, watched and controlled
Who gets paid, who gets disciplined, who gets rolled, so

A transmitter beams my coordinates anywhere on earth
And as radio waves, surveillance, satellite burst
Open up your skull and let some knowledge come in, yeah
Crack open the cranium and let awareness begin, oh

And I don't even know why
The truth seems like a lie
In my cell there is no sky
When I was arrested in Shanghai
When I was arrested in Shanghai
When I was arrested in Shanghai

SLAM interview with Allen Iverson

2011-06-19T02:21:00.002-04:00

THE LAST HERO

OVER THE LAST 17 YEARS, WE’VE WATCHED ALLEN IVERSON GROW FROM A KID AT GEORGETOWN TO NBA ROOKIE OF THE YEAR TO LEAGUE MVP. IN HONOR OF OUR 150TH ISSUE, WE REACHED OUT TO HIM TO TALK ABOUT HIS BASKETBALL PAST AND HIS PLANS TO PLAY IN THE FUTURE.

TZVI TWERSKY

The telltale gravelly timbre of his tone sounds the same as ever. The cadence of his speech, nouns and adjectives flowing forth in melodic bursts, is mesmerizing as ever. The emotion that leaks out of the occasional cracking of his voice is heartfelt as ever. But the words coming out of a soon to be 36-year-old Allen Iverson’s mouth are different than before.

“Not playing this year in the League,” says Iverson from his home in Atlanta, “it humbled me a whole lot. Because I’m a basketball player and I was taken away and not able to play on the biggest stage there is. It had me thinking a lot just about how to handle situations better than I had. I had to learn that this thing can be taken away from you.”

In the past two years, Allen Iverson’s done a lot of soul searching. Exiting the NBA weeks after being named an All-Star starter in 2010, a lack of interest in his services the next offseason and subsequently playing in Turkey for part of this past season gave him time and opportunity to reassess his life. That led to him make some stark realizations.

“The best thing that came out of those experiences is that it opened Allen’s eyes to the fact that there’s more important things out there than basketball,” Gary Moore, Iverson’s long-time business manager and president and founder of Moore Management and Entertainment LLC, says. “Those experiences let him know that one day this is going to end; basketball is going to end.”

Well aware that life after basketball is not too many moons away, Allen Iverson is willing to do whatever it takes for one last chance to prove his mettle in the NBA. One last chance to go out on his terms.

“I WANT TO FINISH MY CAREER OUT IN THE NBA, IF THAT’S POSSIBLE. AND THAT’S IN ANY CAPACITY.”

SLAM: The leg injury that you suffered in Turkey, is that all healed up?

ALLEN IVERSON: Yeah, and it didn’t even take that long. It healed faster than I thought it would, actually.

SLAM: Was it just from years of playing, or did something actually happen to it?

AI: I think it happened at the end of one of the first games I played over there. I got kicked in it. Man, it was bothering me the whole first half of the next game. It was bothering me, but the pain wasn’t too difficult to bear, you know what I mean? I was able to still be effective. I think that was one of the first good games I had over there [laughs]. Then once I got to halftime—all throughout my career, I never iced. All my coaches and trainers always told me, “You need to ice after games.” I never liked icing. But during halftime I put heat on it, and, man, it was hurting so bad that I put ice on it. Then, I was like, Damn, I ain’t ever dealt with no pain like this. I remember running up the court and the guy who was guarding me kept asking, “Are you alright? Are you alright?” Because I was running down the court one time and it hurt so bad that tears were coming down my eyes.

I was like, God almighty. Like, I never dealt with anything like that. I called my manager after the game said, Look man, this thing hurt worse than anything I’ve ever had to deal with. We went and got it checked out; they saw what it was, and I came home and had surgery.

SLAM: And you’ve been hurt a lot of times in your career and played. So if this was enough for surgery and all, that’s enough for people to know it was serious.

AI: Man, let me tell you something: I’ve played through everything, and I’ve never felt nothing like this in my life. When I went to see Dr. Andrews, he wanted to do the procedure, but I wanted him to cut because I had a sore in between two of the bones in my knee. It was a sore growing, and he wanted to cut it out. They was trying to get me to do the surgery there and just cut the whole thing out, but Dr. Andrews said he didn’t want to risk doing it because if they hit a nerve I could lose my foot.

SLAM: How different is playing over there than here?

AI: It was a great, great experience. I had the opportunity to play in front of fans that probably thought they’d never see me. The fans over there were great. I mean, it’s different than the NBA but they are just as excited as the NBA fans. I’m talking about, when I tell you these people are into the game throughout the whole game and halftime, it’s amazing. The fans embraced me, and it was a great opportunity. But my whole thing is, that’s not where I wanted to be. I didn’t want to be away from my wife. I didn’t want to be away from my kids.
I want to finish my career out in the NBA, if that’s possible. And that’s in any capacity. I did a lot of things, I made a lot of mistakes as far as my actions and things that I’ve said, and I think that was the reason for me not being in the NBA. My whole thing now in trying to get back is letting any organization know that I’m willing to play any part that they want me to play.

SLAM: You watching any Playoff ball and thinking, “Damn, I should be out there?”

AI: You know what, it’s hard. It’s hard to watch. Like, I try to watch it and then at times you’re watching and you get emotional and I get away from it, have a little moment by myself or to myself, and then I try to get back and watch it. I mean, it’s basketball—what I love. It’s what I was born to do. So it’s hard to watch, but it’s hard not to watch.

SLAM: What’s drawing you back out on the court? Just a love for the game?

AI: [Long pause; starts to choke up] I love to play basketball. I’ve always said, If I can’t do what I’m accustomed to doing out there on the basketball court, I’ll leave it alone. If I can’t be effective and help my team win basketball games out there, than I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to play the game that I feel like I’m the best in and go out there and not play like that, not feel like I’m that person. I don’t think it would be fair to my fans, my team, my organization, nothing. But when I look at basketball and when I know what I can do on the basketball court, it’s just hard knowing that I went through a whole NBA season and didn’t play when I know how much I can play. I’ll play for a team in any capacity just to get back out there doing what I love to do.

“TWENTY-ONE YEARS OLD, NEVER HAD NOTHING IN MY LIFE, COMING INTO THE LEAGUE, I DID A WHOLE BUNCH OF THINGS THAT I’M NOT PROUD OF, THINGS THAT I’M EMBARRASSED FOR. BUT THOSE THINGS I CAN’T TAKE BACK. ALL I CAN DO IS TRY TO TEACH MY KIDS AND OTHER KIDS AT CAMPS THROUGH MY EXPERIENCES.”

Moore fondly reminisces about the first time LeBron James and Allen Iverson met. It was the summer of ‘03, he remembers because of the Northeast Blackout, and Allen and LeBron rendezvoused at a Ritz-Carlton in NYC. As a bright-eyed, star-struck James stood slack jawed, Iverson made his way over to him, greeting the teenager with a hug and a few words of wisdom.

“Allen told him to be better than he was. He told him to not make the mistakes he’d made. To profit from having seen what Allen’s life was like, to profit from listening to him and to take this thing to the next level,” recalls Moore. “So it makes me proud to see the accomplishments of LeBron James right now because it’s a clear reflection of that conversation that Allen had with him and a clear reflection of the influence that rubbed off from Allen on to him.”

It wasn’t just James, though. While not every kid got to converse with Iverson, they were all influenced in some way—from the Questions they wore, to the ink they got, the braids they rocked, or the arm sleeve they balled in. Allen Iverson was an icon in hoods and suburbs around the nation. He was the NBA’s Jay-Z…and as long as his legacy is intact, he’s still not ready to fade to black.

SLAM: Even if it impacted you negatively, you never conformed.

AI: And a lot of that’s a bittersweet feeling. A lot of those things make me feel good, but I think I took a beating for them. I’m not bitter about it, ‘cause I think I helped people feel like they could be themselves. I took that beating, and now you see guys being whoever they want to be. Besides Dennis Rodman, you didn’t see nobody with tattoos and all that stuff. Now you see kids having a million tattoos and able to be themselves.
I had my cornrows; now you see police officers with cornrows. That used to be the look of the suspect [laughs]. Now you see every body with them: boxers, football players, you know what I mean? So that part of it makes me feel good because I know I had to take a beating for other guys to be accepted the way they are.

SLAM: Remember that first time you wore braids to the Rookie Game?

AI: Yup.

SLAM: What was that like?

AI: [Laughs] People thought it was thug-like. The first few people who saw it thought a basketball player with it was a thug, and that’s totally what I’m not. I ain’t no gangsta. Only tough guy I am is on the basketball court. Off the basketball court, I’m a husband and a father. That [other stuff] ain’t what I am. It was just, you know, the way the world is. The world at times, the way you perceive people and the way you look at people, you got to know who the person is. A lot of people think I’m the biggest asshole in the world, until they meet me and talk to me, because it’s a perception. Then they find out totally different.

SLAM: Yeah, the media helps decide what people think.

AI: That’s right. The whole situation with them talking about me having gambling problems? I haven’t gambled in years [laughs]. But they’re saying I have a gambling problem and an alcohol problem? I’ve never been reprimanded for any alcohol issues, I’ve never had a DUI or anything like that. I drink casually just like everybody else. But one person says that in the media and then everybody lose their minds.

It hurts that people say I went overseas to get the money. Like, nobody said that when I played for the Sixers for a million dollars. Nobody said that when I played for the Grizzlies for three million dollars. It’s just the fact that I went over there. No! I want to play basketball. What the hell am I going to do, sit home and try to get fat? I want to play.

“IT HURTS THAT PEOPLE SAY I WENT OVERSEAS TO GET THE MONEY. NO! I WANT TO PLAY BASKETBALL. WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO DO, SIT HOME AND TRY TO GET FAT? I WANT TO PLAY.”

SLAM: And nobody took the time to try to understand your side of the story?

AI: No, because you’re going to say what you want and think anyway. I feel like once I start talking and once I start getting into it, then people would think that I’m concerned about it. Only thing I did was put out a tweet letting my fans know that I’m fine. Because that’s the only people I’m concerned about—my fans, family and friends. I’ve always said, There’s going to be millions of people that love Allen Iverson and millions of people that hate him, for whatever reason.

Twenty-one years old, never had nothing in my life, coming into the League, I did a whole bunch of things that I’m not proud of, things that I’m embarrassed for. But those things I can’t take back. All I can do is try to teach my kids and other kids at camps through my experiences.

SLAM: Making mistakes, that’s part of growing up. No one can say they haven’t made mistakes in their life.
AI: I used to be bitter toward the media, but I’m not anymore ‘cause I understand their perspective. I understand the perspective of somebody having a job. That’s just like if you have two commentators, or two people on a show, you’re gonna have one person that agrees and one that disagrees. That’s the discussion. People feed their families being what they are, that’s how I have to look at it.

SLAM: Were you ever bitter toward us?

AI: Who? SLAM? Come one, man. The top loyal people as far as media throughout my career?! I mean, anything SLAM needs from me would be done. I’ll never forget what SLAM did for me. SLAM gave me a whole new, different fan-base. That magazine made me more popular than what I was doing out there on the basketball court. Kids still talk about it. Kids still have the magazine. My manager told me about you, I said, Man, are you serious? I would love to do it for SLAM. You’ve always been loyal to me.

SLAM: The media has their opinion. Older NBA fans may have their opinion. But the kids have always stood by you, right?

AI: That’s one of the best things about my life, the way kids feel about me. And not just kids, I’m talking about these young guys that play in the NBA. When I see them, they grew up on me. The way they react to me is the same way I react to Michael Jordan when I see him, or Magic Johnson, Charles Barkley, Isiah Thomas. When I see those guys, it’s just like being a kid in a candy store.

SLAM: And I see some of your game in the current crop of guys.

AI: Yeah, I mean it’s the same style. My whole thing is, I wanted to jump like Michael. I wanted to pass like Magic. I wanted to be fast like Isiah. I wanted to rebound like Barkley. I wanted to shoot like Bird [laughs]. I mean, you put all of that into one thing and there you go, you try to run with it. And I had to do this at this height; obviously they were doing that at another height. It’s like kids and young guys look up to me, that’s how I look up to those guys, the same way. And it just going to keep going on and on.

SLAM: You feel like you’ve got a lot of ball left in you?

AI: I think the sky’s the limit for me. That’s my whole personal thing that’s going to go on, just trying to get back and let the fans know I belong and am capable of exciting them like I’ve been doing for all of these years.

SLAM: You think anyone is going to give you the chance?

AI: [Deep breath] I don’t know. We’re going to work hard at it, but like I said, if it doesn’t happen, I promise you I won’t sit home on my ass. I won’t do that. I’ll play for somebody.

SLAM: You’re going to go out fighting, if you’ve got to go out?

AI: Yeah, absolutely. That’s the way I was taught, and that’s what I owe my fans. I owe just that to them. If they want to continue to see me, then I’ve got to put in the work to make that happen.

SLAM: I guess it all goes back to how you want to be remembered.

AI: That’s right. But you know what? The only people I’m concerned about when it comes to my legacy are my loyal fans. That’s it. Everybody else, they can say what they want about me.

SLAM: Family, friends, fans. That’s the bottom line.

AI: That’s it, man. That’s it. That’s it. That’s it.

Cap ou pas cap (3)

2011-04-10T23:35:00.001-04:00

食堂的食物是土黄色的，炖鸡，炸鸡，鸡爪，易成想到了以前听过的肯德基的鸡有六个翅膀的说法，看着盘子里的鸡腿一阵哆嗦。他觉得饱了。

老大还在享受，一边吃一边说，那两个家伙一定和女人去开房了。他知道老大是在发泄情绪，在这个阳光灿烂的周末的午后，看着外边摆动的大腿，也难怪老大会有情绪。易成耸了耸肩。老大继续说，高三快结束的时候老子也有个女朋友，你知道咯，偷偷摸摸的那种。其实现在想起来那个女生长的也不好看，我也不知道当时喜欢她什么。哦对了，她当时是班长，我是团支书。

真配，易成想。

结果就在我要上轨的时候妈的被老师发现了，老大说，满城风雨。家长老师到处堵我们。高考以后，我想我们也算是经历过风雨的了。谁知道毕业当晚就说咱俩不合适。我也算是看过几本言情小说的，本来寻思应该在高考之后痛苦地抉择一番，缠绵一番，在远去之前去她家找她，说我不要读大学了，我们在一起吧。然后她会很深情的看着我，你不能这么孩子气，前途要紧，我们会保持联系的。谁知道她连这个机会都不给我，弄得我想好的台词烂了一肚子。

老大用半开玩笑的口气讲。不知道他是在倾诉还是急着在证明自己，因为他知道易成还没有交过女朋友。

易成并没有接老大的话题，也或许他并没有在听。吃完了，走吧。他突然说。

回到寝室，怪兽已经回来了。怪兽是被老大说去开房的其中一个，因为长的魁梧，行事冲动，被冠以怪兽的名字。他一看见易成就迫不及待的说，他妈的我刚和女人约好了她打电话来寝室。电话马上就响了。我拿起电话就喊，喂老婆。结果你大爷电话那头说易成在吗，我是他妈。哥们我不是故意要占你便宜，一个电话你就成我儿子了。

大家都笑了。易成想，妈找我会有什么事？她不常给我打电话。

电话又响了。易成迫不及待的拿起来，听见的却是那头的沉默。一阵不安涌了上来。

爷爷去世了。电话终于传出了声音。

Cap ou pas cap (2)

2011-04-04T00:47:00.001-04:00

易成睁开眼睛，发现自己毫无悬念的又躺在床上。他觉得自己睡了很久，似乎上次睁开眼睛已经是十年以前。他觉得自己做了一个很长的梦，一个他一度以为永远无法结束的梦。梦里世界是黑白的。不知道为什么，易成一直认为觉得梦里的世界是有颜色的，但是每次醒来拼命回忆的时候又会发现他们似乎全是黑白的。也许只是我在潜意识里给事物涂上了色彩吧，他想。他想赶快为这个话题下个结论，因为和每次做梦一样，他想回忆起梦里究竟发生了什么。

阳台的门和帘子被推开了，刺眼的阳光射了进来，老大也带着一股烟味射了进来。他又在外面抽烟了。其实大家叫他老大并不是因为他真是老大，只不过因为他是寝室长，而为了一个长字，他什么都得干，比如下楼搬桶装水。老大很镇定的说，吃饭。易成这才发现，时间已经是中午，而寝室其他两位早已不知道去了哪里。

风吹动了半开着的帘子，阳光和阴影在地上来回的纠缠。易成看看窗外，似乎很热，也很闹。他隐约闻到了楼下草地和泥土的味道。这让他想到回忆和梦似乎是相反的。回忆里的世界是有颜色的，他想了想，很肯定的对自己说。因为他想到，几年前的自己，也是在这样灿烂的午后，骑着一辆浅黄色的脚踏车，穿着蓝色的运动服，背着一把暗红色的红棉，无比得意的游荡在路上。对了，我带着的Walkman也是蓝色的，耀眼的蓝色，他沉浸到了回忆里。那个蓝色的Walkman是压岁钱产物，每次去学吉他的时候他都会很得意的把它别的腰间，放入一盒林志颖的磁带，然后在路上迎着风哼，在黎明破晓前，你终于说出，我们的爱情没有明天。他哼着歌，被自己感动得一塌糊涂。他记得自己很陶醉那个感觉。那个时候的世界一定是彩色的。后来他把林志颖带到了学校。有一次他正在自修课上等待破晓，被教导主任发现了，林志颖就这样穿着蓝色的外壳被没收了。他没有反抗，最后也没有领回林志颖。因为他觉得教导主任是对的，是有权威的。当然还有，想要拿回Walkman是要请家长的。直到毕业的时候，他想到了它，决定试试自己的运气。教导主任回忆了很久，很负责任的说，我们没收的东西太多了，一时没有办法确定，但我们一定会帮你找到的。易成再也没有见过那个教导主任。他更愿意相信，他的Walkman消失了。就像生命中出现的许多东西一样，有时候突然消失，就再也不会出现了。至少对易成来说，这样的事件并不少见。所以他的Walkman也只是它们中的一员而已。

老大开口了，走不走。老大的话不多。走，易成条件反射的回答。他拨了一下床头立着的吉他，下了床。

夏天似乎已经迫不及待的想要占领这个城市。似乎他也想看女生们穿着短短的牛仔裙在阳光下摆动双腿。易成走在路上东张西望，夏天是男的，他想。后来他在法语课上证实了这个想法。

一对情侣从他们两个身边走过。易成听到女生撒娇地叫了一声老公。他转过头，看了看老大，心想，幸亏老大不姓龚。他没有说出口，但是下意识地和老大分开了一点。他们仍然平行的行进在去食堂的路上。

你带走一切，抽空了世界，是这一生最冷的夏天。

因为刚才的回忆，这首歌开始在脑子里盘旋。不断的重复，而且下一句总是迫不及待的在第一句结束之前跳进来，让易成措手不及。他使劲摇了摇脑袋，觉得应该说点什么，也许这样歌就会停了。

他正在琢磨什么话题能引起老大的兴趣，食堂到了。

We are the tank men

2011-02-21T18:36:00.001-05:00

記得有一天我在想，我會在唱歌的時候唱披頭四“I am the Walrus”，我會把歌詞改了，我會唱:

I am the tank man. You are the tank man. We are the warriors…

然後這首歌會變成革命歌曲，就像“We Shall Overcome”一樣被在街上手挽手的人群合唱

我的想像變成了一場約會，人們如約在街上手挽手的出現了，但是我爽約了，只是在發呆的空隙不停的暗示自己： This Jasmine is not a name of rice.

Click the picture to see photo gallery from BoingBoing.

Random Share: How do you mock a Chinese speech

2011-01-19T23:44:00.001-05:00

RUSH: "Ah, never mind, we're not going to gyp Fox. I wanted to gyp it because, well, the, Hu Jintao, he was speaking and they weren't translating. They normally, some translator, every couple of words, but Hu Jintao was just going CHING CHONG, CHING CHOW CHONG CHA, CHONG CHANG, CHING CHONG CHIBABABA, OH CHONGHING CHI CHIGARAI, CHENG CHI CHI. CHING ZHA BABA CHENGA CHENG CHI CHI CHI. CHANGI. OOOOOO. CHING CHOLABA BABA. GE CHOW CHOW BA. Nobody was translating."

From: BoingBoing

Random Share: If you ever wonder why we can’t walk straight

2011-01-09T23:41:00.001-05:00

A Mystery: Why Can't We Walk Straight? from NPR on Vimeo.

隨想——我決不是振臂一呼應者雲集的英雄

2011-01-03T00:25:00.001-05:00

小學的時候看到圓珠筆上總會用英文寫：Made in Taiwan，一直不知道是哪裡，憑直覺認為是太丸什么的，腦子想像到的就是“太丸”這兩個字。也不知道從什么時候開始，回想起來，覺悟，哦，原來是台灣。Naive的年代頭腦就是這麼簡單。

但是不知道從什么開始，我開始關注有關這個太丸的新聞，當然和很多人一樣，一開始是帶着一種看熱鬧的心態。我說的“很多人”，是不是應該包括成龍？我不知道。但是慢慢的，我開始理解大家流傳的一種說法，台灣向世界證明了華人世界也可以發展出成熟的民主社會。

我知道身邊的人們，或者是大多數的中國人，對台灣的理解僅僅停留在流行音樂和綜藝節目。他們也許沒有途徑了解更深的背後，或者也可能是不想了解更深的背後。總之，我很驚奇的發現，在人們根深蒂固的認為台灣和我們是一家，不需要任何理由的覺得對岸無比親近的時候，竟然沒有多少人了解，甚至試圖了解這個小島和在這裡生長的人民。也許他們和我們講足夠接近的語言，用足夠接近的成語就已經是“了解”的充分必要條件。但試想，在我們覺得上海人小氣山東人豪氣東北人急脾氣的時候，有沒有問過，自己真的了解上海山東以及東北人嗎？有沒有想過也許站在我們面前的不是一個省份一個城市，而是一個個鮮活的個體，沒有相同性格的個體？也許我們在同一條邊界線的裡面，坐在同一個電視頻道的後面給了我們不需要了解對方的理由，又也許我們了解另一個國家的慾望遠遠勝過想要認識隔壁鄰居的意願。

又也許，我們甚至連自己都不了解。

我想起很早以前很受觸動的魯迅的一句話：我決不是振臂一呼應者雲集的英雄。我也並不是想要挑起什么情緒，也沒有想要說明什么道理，我沒有那個能力。說是“隨想”其實真的只是隨想而已。文字隨着思緒流動罷了。所以如果我現在講的和第一段講的不是同一個話題，請不要見怪，因為我也不知道主題是什么。

也许生活就是这样，结果和初衷永远只会背道相驰，永远都只是“似乎”，就像我对任何事都不敢确定。

Random Share: MJ vs. LBJ

2010-11-28T14:01:00.001-05:00

Maybe the only thing you did right in the summer was changing to #6.

UPDATE: So I figured I’d share the two separate commercials as well. After the break of course.

Random Share: 建設有中國特色的社會主。。。義！

2010-11-20T21:09:00.001-05:00

Something's not right...

2010-11-11T02:28:00.001-05:00

But I don't know what..

I feel I'm disappearing. I'm fading. I'm shrinking. Fast. Like a popped balloon. I could be gone the next day, the next minute, the next time I open my eyes. It makes me afraid to blink my eyes. I want to catch everything through them, and press them hard in my empty inside, like it would pump me up again.

Sometimes I wish I weren't so easily affected. I didn't think I was. But when I hear the song plays "This life hasn't turned out quite the way I wanted to be...", I feel like cut it short and start all over again. Cut it short before it falls any further.

This isn't the way I wanted it to be. But when I'm half conscious under heavy dose, the whole world is slowing down. I can hear people talking laughing joking but I'm not part of it. I'm an observer outside the screen. Or I could be my soul ready to drift out of the body.

I'm obsessed, with all that. It's the only way to get out of the trap. Well, if I don't cut it short...

But until then, until the next bottle, I'm still trapped.

There gotta be some permanent way. Or is there?

Good night world

2010-10-18T00:13:00.001-04:00

Good night world. I’m tired. Tired of all the wars going on; tired of all the fights, disputes, controversies; tired of all the disasters, explosions, floods, hurricanes, wild fires, extreme weathers. tired of being tired of everything. I don’t want to care. If you don’t care, if there are people out there that don’t care, why should I?

Maybe time did have a start and it probably will end, but to me, to us, to the world, it’s endless; and our lives, my life, is not even a millisecond pause that no one will notice and remember. It’s too immense and overwhelming for me to think about. The universe, how big is it? Does it have an end? Sometimes I even don’t believe my own eyes and feels that what I see and touch is actually what it is around me. Maybe my eyes are just playing tricks with lights and reflections on me. Maybe my senses are just giving me wrong signals. Maybe all our eyes and sense and all the time and space are just a big illusion that no one, no one, can escape from. We are all trapped.

Or maybe, inside atoms are just another universe that is too tiny for us to see, and there are life in there also wondering what is outside their universe. Or maybe outside our universe there are other eyes looking at us thinking about the same ultimate question: where are we from?

Yes, where are we from? I don’t know. But I can almost be certain to say that the answer is NOT 42 this time.

It’s too hard for me, and it’s probably going to be beyond our understanding forever. So why should we care?

My head aches. Did I just say I don’t want to care anymore? Maybe.

中共老幹部致全國人民代表大會常務委員會的公開信

2010-10-12T22:25:00.001-04:00

執行憲法第35條，廢除預審制，兌現公民的言論出版自由！

──致全國人民代表大會常務委員會的公開信

李鋭胡績偉等 10月11日，2010

全國人民代表大會常務委員會：

中華人民共和國1982年憲法第35條載明：“中華人民共和國公民有言論、出版、集會、結社、遊行、示威的自由。”這一條文28年不兌現，被黨政機關制定的“執行”細則所否定。這種原則承認具體否定的假民主，成為世界民主史上的醜聞。

2003年2月26日，胡錦濤主席上任不久，在中共中央政治局常委與民主黨派人士舉行的民主協商會上，明確地說：

新聞解禁、開放人民輿論陣地，是社會的主流意見和訴求，是正常的，要以立法形式解決。共産黨自身不改革，不改造，就會失去生命力，走向自然消亡。

2010年10月3日美國有線電視台CNN播出了訪談節目主持人法瑞德．扎卡利亞對中國總理溫家寶的專訪。溫家寶回答記者提問時說：

言論自由對任何國家都不可或缺；中國憲法賦予民衆享有言論自由；人民對民主自由的訴求不可抗拒。

根據憲法和胡錦濤主席、溫家寶總理講話精神，我們僅就兌現言論出版自由之憲法權利方面陳情如下：

關於我國言論出版自由的現狀

我堂堂中華人民共和國公民名義上“當家做主”61年，但我們享有的言論出版自由竟不如回歸祖國前的香港，即不如殖民地居民。

回歸前的香港是英國殖民地，女王政府任命總督管理這個地方，但港英當局給香港居民言論出版自由，不是空頭的，紙面上的，是落實的，兌現的。

1949 年建國，人民歡呼解放了，當家做主了，毛澤東宣佈“中國人民從此站起來了。”但直到今天，建國61年，搞了30年改革開放，我們還沒有得到香港人殖民地時代就有的言論出版自由。現在有些參政議政的書籍，要拿到香港出版，這不是回歸祖國的福蔭，是沿襲殖民時代的舊法。大陸人民的“當家作主”地位實在太窩囊。國家宣稱的有中國特色的“社會主義民主”實在太尷尬。

豈止普通公民，連共産黨的高級幹部都沒有言論出版自由。最近李鋭遇到一件事情：不久前《周小舟紀念文集》出版，原來收進了李鋭1981年在《人民日報》發表的紀念周小舟的一篇文章，但出版的書中沒有。周小舟夫人打電話向李鋭解釋：“北京通知，不能用李鋭的文章。”連1981年發表在黨報上的舊作也不讓收進文集，真是荒唐至極！李鋭說：“這算什麼樣的國家！我大聲疾呼：新聞必須自由！扼殺公民的言論自由是完全違法的！”

豈止高級幹部，連國家總理都沒有言論出版自由！2010年8月21日溫家寶總理在深圳發表題為《只有堅持改革開放，國家才有光明前途》的講話。談到 “不僅要推進經濟體制改革，還要推進政治體制改革。沒有政治體制改革的保障，經濟體制改革的成果就會得而復失，現代化建設的目標就不可能實現。”新華社 21日通稿《開創經濟特區的美好明天》，把溫家寶講話中政治體制改革的內容刪掉了。

2010 年9月22日（美國當地時間）溫家寶總理在紐約與美國華文媒體和港澳媒體負責人進行座談，再次強調了“政治體制改革”的重要性。溫說：“關於政治體制改革，我曾經講過，經濟體制改革如果沒有政治體制改革的保障，也不會徹底取得成功，甚至已經取得的成果還會得而復失。”溫家寶隨後在紐約聯合國總部出席第 65屆聯合國大會一般性辯論發表題為《認識一個真實的中國》的講話，其中也談及了政治體制改革。9月23日（北京時間）晚間，中央電視台《新聞聯播》以及新華社通稿報導這些活動時，只報導了溫家寶談及海外華人的處境、海外華文媒體的作用等內容，提及政治體制改革的講話，都被過濾掉了。

這些事情，如果追究責任，絶對查不到具體人，這是一隻看不見的黑手。他們自知理虧違憲，通常以電話通知某人的作品不能發表、某事不能見諸媒體。打電話的官員不留姓名，叮囑執行者為其保密，但必須執行他的電話指示。这隻看不見的黑手就是中宣部。現在是中宣部凌駕於黨中央之上，凌駕於國務院之上。試問中宣部有什麼權力封鎖總理的聲音

有什麼權力剝奪全國人民對總理講話的知情權

我們的核心要求是取消審批制，改行追懲制

把憲法第35條言論出版自由變成可望而不可及的牆上畫餅，是經過《出版管理條例》等具體執行細則來完成的。這些執行細則，為而言之就是深文周納的審批制。有數不清的清規戒律限制言論出版自由。制定新聞出版法，廢除審批制，已成為當務之急。

建議全國人大立即着手制定新聞出版法，廢除《出版管理條例》和地方當局管制新聞出版的那些條條框框。落實憲法第35條給予公民言論出版自由，從體制上看就是從黨政機關直接控制到媒體相對獨立，從“黨的喉舌”轉變為“社會公器”。因此，新聞出版法的立法基礎必須是實行追懲制，而不能再以“加強黨的領導”的名義強化審批制。所謂審批制，就是出版物在出版以前須經黨政機關的審查，批准了你才能出版，不批准出了就是非法出版物。所謂追懲制，就是出版物不必向黨政機關報批，總編輯通過了就開印，出版發行完全自由。出版後如有不良後果和糾紛，政府再介入，根據法律判斷是非對錯。世界各國新聞出版法制的發展，走的是由審批制向追懲制過渡的道路。無疑，追懲制比起審批制是一個歷史性進步，對推動人文科學和自然科學的發展，推動社會和諧歷史進步起了偉大的作用。英國早在 1695年即廢除了預防檢查制。1881年法國廢除了預防檢查制，報紙、刊物出版前的手續僅僅需要一份簡單的聲明，由報刊領導人簽署，郵寄共和國檢察院即可。我國目前實行的書報審查制度，比英國落後315年，比法國落後129年。

我們的具體要求：

一、取消媒體的主管單位，由主辦單位獨立負責；真正落實出版單位的社長、總編輯負責制。

二、尊重記者，樹立記者 “無冕之王”的社會地位。記者報道群體性事件，揭發官員貪污腐敗，是為民請命的神聖事業，應受到保護和支援。立即制止某些地方政府和公安機關隨意抓捕記者的違憲行為。追究謝朝平案的幕後操縱者，渭南市委書記梁鳳民必須下台，以申黨紀，以儆效尤。

三、取消限制媒體跨省進行輿論監察的禁令，保障中國記者在全中國領土上採訪報道的權利。

四、互聯網是社會資訊和公民意見的重要交流平台，除確實涉及國家機密的資訊和侵犯公民隱私的言論之外，網路管理部門不能隨意刪除網帖和跟帖，取消網特，取消“五毛黨”，取消對“翻墻”的技術限制。

五、黨史無禁區，中國公民有權知道執政黨的罪錯。

六、允許《南方周末》和《炎黃春秋》改制為民營報刊作為探路試點。報刊民營化是政治改革的方向。歷史的教訓是：施政者與評議者高度一體化，政府和媒體都姓 “黨”，自己搭台唱戲，自己鼓掌喝彩，是很難和民意溝通實現正確領導的。從大躍進到文化大革命，大陸所有的報刊雜誌、廣播電視，從來沒有反映過真實的民意。黨和國家領導人耳邊聽不到不同的聲音，就既難發現、更難糾正正在發生的全局性的錯誤。執政黨和政府拿納稅人的錢辦媒體為自己歌功頌德，這在民主國家是不允許的。

七、允許已經回歸中國的香港、澳門的書籍報刊在大陸公開發行。我國加入了WTO，在經濟上已經融入世界，企圖在文化上閉關鎖國，是違背改革開放的既定方針的。港澳文化是送上國門的先進文化，觀之於港澳報刊書籍備受群衆歡迎而益信。

八、轉變各級宣傳部門職能，由制定多少個“不准”，轉變為保障資訊準確、及時、暢通；由幫助貪官污吏壓制封鎖批評揭露的稿件，轉變為支援媒體對黨政機關發揮監督作用；由封報刊、撤總編、抓記者，轉變為對抗強權，保護媒體和記者。宣傳部門在黨內、在社會上名聲很臭，要做幾件好事恢復名譽。在適當的時機，可以考慮宣傳部更名，以符合世界潮流。

迫切陳情，敬希亮察。

2010年10月1日

發起人（23人）：

（點擊更多查看23名發起人及476人簽名名單：）

李鋭（前中央組織部常務副部長，中共十二屆中央委員，十二、十三屆中顧委委員。)

胡績偉（前《人民日報》社長、總編輯，第六、七屆全國人大常委，全國新聞學會聯合會會長）

江平（原政法大學校長、終身教授，七屆人大常委、人大法律委員會副主任）

李普（原新華社副社長）

周紹明（原廣州軍區政治部副主任）

鐘沛璋（原中宣部新聞局局長）

王永成(上海交通大學教授，歐洲科學、藝術與人文研究院通訊院士)

張忠培（故宮博物院研究員，原院長，中國考古學會理事長）

杜光（原中共中央黨校教授）

郭道暉 (原《中國法學》雜誌社總編輯)

蕭默（原中國藝術研究院建築藝術研究所所長）

莊浦明（原人民出版社副社長）

胡甫臣 (原中國工人出版社社長兼總編輯)

張定（原中國社會科學院社會科學出版社社長）

於友（原《中國日報》社總編輯）

歐陽勁 (香港《太平洋雜誌》總編輯)

於浩成 (原群瀧出版社社長)

張清（原中國電影出版社社長）

俞月亭 (原福建電視台台長、高級記者)

沙葉新 (前上海人民藝術劇院院長，現為回族獨立作家)

孫旭培（原社會科學院新聞研究所所長）

辛子陵（原國防大學當代中國編輯室主任）

鐵流（民刊《往事微痕》總編輯）

法律顧問：

宋岳（中國籍公民，美國紐約州執業律師）

簽名者：476人（按姓氏筆畫排序）

丁弘（南通大學教授、南通日報老報人）

丁品（原《中國環境報社》主任記者）

丁純先（原盈江縣財政局幹部）

丁志遂（原南京植物研究員）

丁惠文（原瑞麗三中教師）

於向真（原中國兒童報主任編輯）

於增佑（原錦州公路段幹部）

馬育忠（西安編輯）

馬躍三（原開遠市人民路小學教師）

馬兆庚（原大理州製藥廠支部書記）

馬鶴鳴（原大理學院教師）

馬懷麟（原開遠市商業局科長）

馬文都：自由撰稿人

王中陵（西安編輯）

王孔旭（原江漢大學副編審）

王家典（原江蘇社會科學院歷史研究所所長）

王林(原浙江師範大學教師)

王絮（吉林原《人民日報》吉林站編輯）

王學泰（中國社會科學院文學所研究員）

王毅（中國社會科學院學者）

王書瑤(原國家稅務總局退休研究員)

王承祥 (原錦州公路段幹部）

王巧珍（自由職業者）

王衍周（原東北空軍第八航校主任教員）

王鬰林（原東北空軍第三航校飛行員）

王恩彬（原東北空軍第八航校助理員）

王丕堯（原遼寧省第二建築公司技術員）

王兆洪（原芒市華僑農場中學總務主任）

王書元（原瑞麗三中教師）

王華彩（原中共昆明市委統戰部幹部處長）

王忠福（原文山銀行退休人員）

王豪（原開遠市農業銀行幹部）

王從皎（原西南林學院副教授）

王靜（原河南省衛生廳副廳長）

王明全（川自貢第二十八中學校退休教師）

王明正（四川客車廠）

王麗娜（河北省圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

王秀麗（河北省圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

王麗雪（河北省圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

王朝啓（河北省圍場縣永合義村明天幼兒園園長）

王成文（成都建機械公司）

王永祥（原大理市第二中學高級教師）

王明全（四川自貢第二十八中學校退休教師）

王譽虎（北京公民）

方小芬( 原廣州有色金屬研究院工程師)

尹儀方（原中國科學院電工研究所高級工程師）

尹賢緒（蘭州交通大學教師）

尹惠（北京二外離休教師）

蘭春波（原成都鐵路局幹部）

孔德亮（原魯甸縣供銷社農村股股長）

孔令平（原重慶專用汽車廠退修職工）

毛微昭(原浙江省政協委員、浙江傳媒學院離休幹部、新聞學者)

毛崇傑（中國社會科學院退休研究員）

車忠文（原四川青年報編輯）

史宗寶（原錦西鋼鐵廠幹部）

田盛頤（原中央民族大學哲學系副教授）

白孟秋（原東北空軍第三航校飛行員）

白祖誠（原北京市旅遊局黨委副書記兼北京旅遊學院院長）

白雅琴（圍場縣人民政府副縣長）

石天河 (原《星星詩刊》編輯)

艾曉明（廣州中山大學教授紀錄片工作者）

艾風(原《四川日報》社高級記者)

皮公亮（原長江日報主任記者）

葉式禮（成都市金牛區教育局幹部）

葉匡政 (北京詩人)

盧菊生（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

鄧葆宸（原北京科學教育電影製片廠一級導演）

鄧有聲（原湖北襄樊機床廠高級工程師）

伍登祥（原成都電子科技大學副研究員）

劉文介 (原民革成都市委常委)

劉宏文 (江都市第一中學退休教師)

劉長林(中國社會科學院哲學所研究員退休）

劉正纚（原北京大成中學教師）

劉兆豐（原四川省計委副主任）

劉慶雲（原湘潭大學教授）

劉志琴（中國社會科學院近代史所研究員）

劉鵬（中央黨校《理論動態》原編審）

劉慧珊（原外交學院教授）

劉緒光（自貢鑄鋼廠工程師）、

劉立介 (原湖南科技大學教授)

劉成端（原昭通市鹽津縣紀委副書記）

劉孔伏(歷史文化學者、自由撰稿人)

劉冰（原四川青年報記者）

劉祖萱 (中冶公司第十九冶金建設公司老乾處處長)

劉孟懿（原金平縣第一中學教師）

劉克文（原原東北空軍飛行員遼）

畢賓生（江西省婦女幹部學校副校長）

朱爾剛（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

後永年（原大理學院保衛處長）

許相照（原廣州市糧食局幹部）

許為南（原東北空軍16師機械工程師）

馮志軒(原中央機械工業部高級經濟師)

馮成學（原威信縣教師進修學校職工）

孫正荃(原青海日報記者，華東師範大學教授)

孫文廣（原山東大學退休教授）

孫開泰 (中國社會科學院歷史所研究員)

孫小平（原廣州市黃埔區汽車製造廠醫務室護士）

孫君秣（離休幹部）

任彥芳（作家）

任建樹（歷史學家上海社科院研究員原中國陳研會顧問）

朱筱超(原山東濟南長清新華書店退休職工)

朱正琳（湖北大學退休教師）

朱華（自貢第四人民醫院醫生）

江燕生（原中山大學北校區圖書館副研究館員）

江嬰（天津詩人）

沈重（南昌大學歷史系教授）

呂林科（原威信縣農機公司幹部）

呂少柏（深圳香港詩詞學會常務理事、香港文藝出版社常務副會長）

呂伯春（原蕪湖5720廠高級工程師）

江雁玲（原廣州市東山區人民醫院耳鼻喉科護士）

江濤（原廣州市天河區愛國衛生辦公室辦事員）

江海星（廣東省出版集團審計師）

汪業祥（原蕪湖5720廠工程師）

許進（南通市電視機廠離休幹部、自由寫作者）

許有為（合肥學院離休幹部）

許醫農（原貴州人民出版社副編審）

許炳星（原曲靖師範專科學校外語教師）

關秋嵐（北大附中高級教師）

杜仲（原攀枝花市文聯主席）

杜榮進 (原浙江日報資深記者，離休幹部)

杜高（原中國戲劇家協會黨組書記）

汪兆鈞（原安徽國寶集團董事長）

汪廷奎(原廣東省社會科學院副研究員)

汪杏莜（肅省特級教師）

汪孝直(重慶市公民)

吳明先(高級編輯《信息時報》原副總編輯)

吳大江（湖南省衡陽市公民）

吳之伯（原昭通師範專科學校副校長）

吳起濱（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

吳非（原廣州軍體院電教中心美術工程師）

吳剛（圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會會長）

吳昌寧（原保山一中教師）

余凱成（原大連理工大學教授）

李澈（原中交第一航務工程設計院院長）

李冰(香港《東方雜誌》記者、編輯)

李昌玉(原山東大學附中退休教師)

李志強（資深媒體人，原江西青年報副刊部主任）

李守玉（西安編輯）

李國雲 (原雲南省保山市潞江農場中學校長)

李雅松（原成都市工業學校高級講師）

李紅騎 (二炮後勤部原生産部北京華強實業總公司總經理)

李淑雲 ( 江蘇南通退休工人)

李忠初 (原湖南科技大學教授)

李汝高 (四川省自貢市退休教師)

李和顯（自貢永安鄉農民）、

李展飛（自流井鐘錶社職工）、

李國昌（自貢大安鹽廠工程師）、

李文堯 (人民銀行經濟師)

李雲飛（自由職業者）

李彥蓉（原昭陽區教師）

李少楷（原昭通煙廠卷煙經理部主任）

李滌龍（自由職業者）

李建榮（原威信縣商業局幹部）

李德強（原大關縣人大常委會副主任）

李成章（原威信縣小學教師）

李霓琳（自由職業者）

李玉泉（原前所果樹農場氣象工程師）

李玉蘭（女，原山海關船廠幹部）

李雙紅（女，原長江科學研究院幹部）

李曉蕓 (原成都市農工民主黨副秘書長)

李學文（原開遠市房管局幹部）

李興儒（原昆明市第二十七中學校長）

李斌（原紅河州教育局離休幹部）

李運禹（原彌勒縣圖書館館長）

李如芳（原開遠市靈泉辦事處退休人員）

李澤衡（原雲南人民出版社副編審）

李蔭祥（原曲靖市檢察院離休幹部）

李慶雲（原同濟大學外語教師）

李紹謙（原湖南文藝出版社編審）

李定中（原《人民日報》高級編輯）

李凌（原中國社會科學院社會科學出版社副總編輯）

李明楊 (四川建設工業物資公司)

李成忠 (原中國海洋石油南海西部公司教育培訓中心經理)

李曉蕓 (原成都市農工民主黨副秘書長)

李世安（原廣東省第二工人醫院藥劑師，離休幹部）

李乾（武漢自由撰稿人）

李振東（自由職業者）

李悔之（網絡專業作家）

宋光裕（原昭通市發改委幹部）

宋晶（西安編輯）

宋澤宇：（原四川樂至縣供銷社幹部）

宋錚（原《人民日報》高級記者）

宋之平（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

伍崇高 (四川洪雅自由攝影人)

伍登祥（原成都電子科技大學副研究員）

湯建甲（原保山縣公安局幹部）

何真信（自貢市勞動局退休公務員）

何浩正（原昭通市鹽津縣委組織部部長）

何蜀 (原《紅岩春秋》雜誌副主編)

辛成哲（詩詞世界》雜誌社社長）

嚴永強（原葫蘆島市電台台長）

但俊峰（原自貢水泥廠職工，現個體經商）

余永慶（原中共昭通地區農業學校書記）

余莉萍（自由職業者）

何卓堂（原昆明醫學院教授）

何祚榕（原中國社會科學院《中國社會科學》雜誌編審）

何燕（原遼寧省義縣糧食局工程師）

何英偉（原東北空軍第三航校電氣工程師）

蘇致舜（原保山地區貿易公司經理）

蘇毅（原廣東省機電設備公司經理兼黨委書記）

蘇良沛（原成都市參事室主任）

蘇曼中（原大理市建築材料經理公司科長）

蘇瑛（原河口縣統計局局長）

蘇守義（原重慶市江北區魚嘴職業中學高級教師）

冷留萍（女，原揚州大學學生）

林蕙清(原雲南省保山市隆陽區婦幼保健院醫師)

林聖然（原遼寧省綏中縣農場工程師）

茅於軾（經濟學家原中國社科院研究員）

武宜三（香港五七學社幹事，中國當代史研究者）

武進之（原華東師範學院教師）

金煊 (揚州市科技情報研究所副研究員)

金衆智（中國現代史獨立學者）

金陽（中國電銲條廠外貿處處長）

金福田（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

金明元（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

羅福（原開遠市公路總段職校副校長）

羅友喬（原長沙交通大學分校校長）

賈民卓（原撫順市木材公司幹部）

張大芝(原杭州大學新聞傳播系主任、教授)

張允若(原浙江大學新聞傳播系教授)

張曼平（原中國海洋大學教授、博導）

張有志（原國企揚州冶金機械廠退休高工）

張幼南（揚州市公民）

張耀傑（中國藝術研究院研究員，中國農工民主黨黨員）

張純良（儒學研究會會長）

張存根（中國社會科學院研究生院教授、博導）

張肅文（原武漢大學教授）

張峨放（深圳市萃園中學高級教師）

張清宇（深圳詩人）

張博樹（獨立學者，原中國社會科學院哲學所助理研究員）

張文洪：（自貢建築設計院工程師，五十年代自貢市市長張奇的兒子）

張清亮（自貢鑄鋼廠職員）

張鏞（原開遠市糧食局幹部）

張占洪（原德宏州醫院醫生）

張海波（原中共個舊市委黨校教師）

張循（原上海市《新聞報》總編助理）

張欽芬（原昭通市第二醫院主管營養師）

張石石( 瀋陽體育學院教師）

張景岩（原北京法學會秘書長）

張學洪（原新華日報記者，原江蘇省社科院社會學研究所所長）

張玉仙（女，原南京醫院醫生）

張家寶（原北京製藥廠工程師）

張季旭（原南昌科技大學教務處處長）

張靈感（原廣州市中山圖書館副研究館員）

張興發（原個舊市長石礦職工）

張岩（河北省圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

張風麗（河北省圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

張有志 (揚州冶金機械廠高級工程師)

張鑫（原錦州閥門總廠工程師）

張玳 (北大附中高級教師)

范興華（原湖北省漢口公路局工程師）

范永長（原瀋陽市大東區汽車修理公司工程師）

周以駿（揚州市邗江區中學離休高級教師）

周良宵（中國社科院近代史所研究員）

周建文（原天津大港油田高級工程師）

周仁（原遼寧省綏中縣供銷社幹部）

周明（四川米易縣林業局教師）

周熙文（原武漢市財政局總會計師）

陳平（原四川省社科院研究人員）

陳昭 (北京公民)

陳偉卿(原浙江師範大學教師)

陳立德（自貢機械二廠退休職工，原廠工會主席）、

陳文莘 (原湖北黨校教授)

陳樹祥（原瀋陽市自動化儀表廠工程師）

陳甲午（原泰興市商業局幹部）

陳角色（女，原南京師範大學教師）

陳大壽（原保山三中教師）

陳瀾 (原成都鐵路局教育處科長)

陳瑞晴 (原北影文學部編輯、作家)

陳遂懷（原廣州市黨校研究員）

陳仁德 (重慶記者、編輯、詩人)

陳樊華（原彌勒縣供銷社幹部）

羅焚 (原中國文聯國際部主任)

羅志強（航空航天大學教授）

羅以（湖南湖南衡陽詩詞副主編）

羅樹生（湖南醫師）

羅昌教（自貢大安鹽廠工人）

羅啓松（昭通市小學教師）

楊崇誠（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

楊翊強（原長沙理工大學教授）

楊銘傳（原四川省教育學院幹部）

楊海（自由撰稿人）

楊興培（原昭通市種畜場職員）

楊伯華（原外交學院教授）

楊小平（四川宏華友信石油機械有限公司工程師）

楊天胤（原祿勸縣人民醫院幹部）

楊少瓊（中國熱帶農業科學院橡膠研究所研究員）

楊瓊英 (原個舊市工人文化宮幹部)

楊之祿（原昆明市輕紡供銷公司幹部）

楊如蘭（原紅河州水電設計院副院長）

楊衛路（原廣州市防疫站計劃免疫室主任醫師）

楊森（原瀋陽市鐵西區蔬菜公司書記）

楊海（自由撰稿人）

楊駿祺（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

范亦豪 (南開大學教授)

延奇南（原廣州市美術學院圖書館副研究館員）

延江梨（廣東省檔案館副館長）

陸清福（原右派自由撰稿人）

屈楚平（四川甘孜州林業局812林場子弟學校教師）

居思基 (原《新聞報》主任編輯，記者)

賀振富（原鎮雄縣政法委副書記）

胡開雲（原昭通市廠辦學校教師）

胡遠東（自貢大安區醫院醫生）、

胡孝師（自貢大安鹽廠工程師）、

胡俊卿（原鹽津縣工商局職工）

胡榮蔚（鹽津縣醫院職工）

胡豪（廣東《新聞聯說》主編）

胡興禎（原錦州女兒河紡織廠工會主席）

胡仲（原南京農業大學科長）

林蕙清(原雲南省保山市隆陽區婦幼保健院醫師)

范家彬（原昭通市昭陽區衛生局中醫主治醫師）

歐陽興科（原昭通市物資局局長）

柯平憑（研究員同濟大學教師）

武進之（原華東師範學院教師）

鄭海天（原中國社會科學院研究生院編審）

姚監復（原中共中央農村政策研究室研究員）

姚孔亮（原開遠市機械化養鷄場場長）

姚寶珠（中國社會科學院近代史研究所副譯審，退休）

姚昆明（自貢第一人民醫院醫生）

姚京喜（原揚州退休中學教師）

俞稚夫(原四川《涼山日報》副總編)

俞梅蓀(原國務院辦公廳秘書)

俞安國 (四川省崇州市教師進修學校高講師)

浩嶺（杭州師範大學教授、作家）

高積順（蘇州大學法學院教授）

高國發（吉林省鎮賚縣委黨校原副校長）

高越農(武漢科技大學信息學院離休教授)

高軍生（西安編輯）

高鋒（原中國駐瑞典哥德堡總領事）

高文勃（原湖南省常德市技術學校教師）

錢理群（北京大學教授）

錢宏（中歐社會論壇首席顧問）

錢鋒（原長江日報主任記者）

錢德培（揚州市邗江區中學退休高級教師）

錢明鏘(原浙江金華教師，現世界漢文化聯合會執行會長)

倪明(遼寧盤錦退休工人)

倪艮山 (原國家經委幹部}

趙正榮（原昭通市鹽津縣紀委書記）

趙玉榮（原威信縣檢察院監所科科長）

趙曉清（會澤縣煙草公司統計師）

趙曉鈴（重慶作家協會主辦的《紅岩》文學雜誌副主編）

趙群（原成都軍區政治部幹事）

趙純武（原廣東省審計廳辦公室主任）

趙華（原保山河圖中學校長）

趙暉（南航機長）

趙立魁 (原農業電影製片廠副總編輯

趙維光（原開遠市崇文小學教師）

趙曉藝（現今失業者）

祝世華（教育學家高等教育出版社原副總編）

段躍（自由編輯）

鄭權東（原航空發動機工廠黨校教授）

鄭朋成（圍場縣永合義村大學生聯誼會聯絡員）

鄭興（原開遠市服裝廠工人）

翁寒春（深圳香港詩詞學會秘書長）

袁鷹（曾任人民日報文藝部主任）

黃心培（上海編輯）

黃大地（北京師範大學圖書館館員，中國世界古代中世紀史學會會員）

黃承勛（四川省醫學科學院離休幹部）

黃鐘麟（福建漳州老年大學教師）

黃明清（自貢高壓容器廠退休職工，原車間主任）

黃有韜（浙江自由撰稿人）

黃紹英（自由職業者）

黃志達（原上海辭書出版社編審)

黃然 (博物學者江蘇南通博物院原代院長)

黃任民 (南京煉油廠高級工程師)

黃爾亮（外交學院副教授，退休）

黃達漢（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

蕭家正（深圳詩人《香港詩詞》執行主編香港詩詞學會副會長）

蕭遠 ( 原華中師範大學教育系教育學教研室主任)

蕭祝前（湖南《剌玫瑰》主編）

蕭瑞怡 (湖南冷水江市委黨校講師)

陶紹康（原昭通市化建公司支部書記）

陶劍（湖南長沙教師）

郭世佑（中國政法大學教授）

郭焱（民盟成都市委離休幹部）

郭雄（中國曆史博物館研究員）

惜輝（倪朋遼寧某廠退休工人）

唐迎憲（自貢蜀光中學教師）、

唐先傑（西昌興共達公司經理）、

唐寶林 (研究員中國社科院近代史所原中國陳研會會長)

唐道富 (原成都紅旗玻璃廠幹部)

唐碧玉（原金平縣第一中學工人）

唐夏揚 (原東北空軍轉業幹部)

唐世政（新疆革命烈士子弟老黨員）

徐厚生（原大慶油田工程師）

徐明元（原大慶油田幹部）

徐多嬌（女，南京信貸公司幹部）

徐中秋（原江蘇省化工廠工人）

徐慶全（《炎黃春秋》副主編）

徐基坤（原成都鐵路局於部）

袁世垠（原世界知識出版社副總編）

袁鷹（曾任人民日報文藝部主任）

姜萬里（原瀋陽市塔灣街道辦公室副主任離休）

曉亮（原中國社會科學院《中國社會科學》雜誌編審）

聶西文（原昭通煙廠經濟師）

鐵朝清（原魯甸縣稅務科副科長）

慄憲庭（美術批評家、策展人、中國現代藝術‘教父’）

顧志華（揚州水産公司副經理退休幹部）

顧菊英（中國社科院近代史所副編審）

郝亞琴（原廣州市暨南大學醫務室藥劑師）

閻樹林（揚州市退休中學教師）

傅升（西安科研人員）

傅占魁（深圳中國民進黨湖北省委員）

傅世清（原開遠市第一中學職工）

傅國棟（原昆明市第十九中學教師）

博繩武（原瑞普集團工程師）

符加洪（原昭通市昭陽區公安局）

常泳東（原開遠市黨務局幹部）

常正山（原上海科學院寄生蟲研究員）

常征（主任記者中華工商時報江蘇記者站原站長）

崔汝益（原威信縣委財貿部部長）

曾樹美（李曰垓同志遺孀）

曾紀木( 湖北十堰東風汔車公司離休幹部)

野夫（自由作家）

章鎮（浙江大學城市學院學生）

盛森芝 (北京大學力學系教授)

龔學珍（李荷生同志遺孀）

程迺欣（原全國婦聯英文《中國婦女》副編審）

程燐元（原中共昭通地委講師團講師）

彭志一(原上海通用機械(集團)公司副總工程師中國民主同盟盟員)

彭頌聲（深圳原深圳特區報主編）

彭海鈞（原昭通市鹽津縣煙草公司經理）

彭建安(原《廣東省志科學技術志》副主編）

彭正普 (原鄭州大學新聞系副教授)

彭丹 (成都市總工會離休幹部)

彭慕陶 (原成都市政府幹部)

彭標（原雲南省水電設計院幹部）

董長林（原東北製藥總廠藥物研究院工程師）

解正中（安徽省蕪湖市文聯大江雜誌編輯部原副主任）

溫躍光（自貢大安鹽廠工人）

魯景秀（原鞍山市醫院醫生）

韓樹山 ( 湖北十堰東風汔車公司報社編輯 )

寇洪濤（西安詩人）

謝顯倫（原昭通市經委副主任）

謝小玲 (謝韜之女，民營企業家)

賴家玲（女原蒙特內格羅林場工人）

蔣傑慶（中國政法大學09級學生）

蔣維中（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

鮑文素（女，原南京市行政學院員工）

蔡軍(原浙江省人民政府參事室副處級調研員)

蔡平生（公民）

蔡駿（原泰州市規劃局幹部）

鍾波(原北交大研究生、歷史研究學者)

鍾雁（成都市城市雕塑繪畫院工程師）

鍾安河（原北京市測繪設計研究院高級工程師）

鍾行果 (原自貢六中副校長、現自貢市地方志辦公室副總編)

鍾行果（自貢焊條廠退休工人）

鍾行恪（自貢三十二中教師）、

鍾行稱 (自貢鳳凰中學教師)

鍾宇明（自貢美術公司畫家）

鍾明全 (自貢第四人民醫院醫生）

熊永年(原《人民日報》編輯)

董小英（中國社會科學院外國文學研究所的研究員）

董建民（原保山市國稅局幹部）

董克讓（原雲南省新聞出版局離休幹部）

葛憲蕾（西北政法大學學生）

管思聰（北京大學基礎醫學院08級學生）

竇敏（原昆明市輕紡供銷公司黨辦主任）

譚明德（原廣州市搪瓷廠副廠長）

廖國華（湖北詩人）

廖慧（IBM廣州公司銷售經理）

廖讓初（原廣州市油制氣廠保管員）

廖健（北京ADOBER軟件公司工程師）

廖煥然（原廣州軍區司令部防化技術大隊高級工程師）

滕敘兗 ( 高級工程師、作家)

樊為池（揚州大學農學院離休副教授）

薛大啓（原東北空軍轉業幹部）

燕凌（原中國社會科學院《中國社會科學》雜誌副總編輯）

黎昌瓚（原四川青年報編輯）

戴開訓（原鎮雄縣司法局副局長）

戴晴（原《光明日報》社記者）

臧又珊（原南昌鋼絲廠廠長）

臧巍巍（洛陽軸承集團公司退休幹部）

魏光鄴（原祿勸縣扶貧辦幹部）

魏歡歡（中國政法大學學生）

魏慎之（原彌勒縣離休幹部）完

Random Share

2010-10-11T13:40:00.001-04:00

Just a random share. As a quote from last night’s video, “in-fucking-credible”

Dear John

2010-10-10T02:42:00.001-04:00

Dear John,

Happy Birthday. It’s the 9th of October, 2010, your birthday.

I know we never met, but I feel like I know you. I feel we share something similar, things that we value. I’ve just been to the place where you last walked, and I could feel you. It’s been a while, since you were gone, since I’ve been around.

But it’s not just me. If you could see, if you could feel. People are throwing a surprise birthday party for you. Yes it’s a surprise. It’s surprising to know that there are people that still care.

There are still greater battles to be fought. At least for me, for people like me. The world’s not flat. I can imagine that how you don’t believe in heaven yet end up with being in heaven. It’s an irony, just like the world, just like life.

Maybe there are people that don’t understand you, that don’t care about you, or that have hurt you. Please forgive them, and I know you would have done so. Because it’s something I would have done. Everyone needs to be loved and to feel needed. Even you, and me.

I saw people laughing and singing today. I know you would have done the same if you were still behind that window watching. Thank you for giving us another reason to party.

Sincerely yours,

Jude

P.S. As a tribute:

All My Loving

Across the Universe

Happy Birthday, the war is still not over

2010-10-08T23:19:00.001-04:00

曉波是得獎了。這個56歲卻看上去更像70歲的人得獎了。他成了一面旗幟，一個標靶。在所有人振奮，激動，自豪；或者是憤怒，譴責，茫然的時候，是不是應該靜下來想一想，我們的未來是怎樣的，曉波的未來又是怎樣的。我不知道我的未來在哪裡，但是能猜到曉波的餘生。他用自己僅剩的自由換來了什么？與其說他成了一面旗幟，其實不如說他“被”成了一面旗幟，一面風燭殘年的旗幟，一面不知道還能能挺立多久的旗幟。

蠻政不逾百年，tic toc，時間在走。我以沉默向某人致敬，向某一群人一代人致敬。今夜我會為你們點起不眠的蠟燭；明晚，我堅信會看見無數飄搖但卻堅定的燭火。。。

P.S. Happy birthday John! After 30 years, the war is still not over.

I’m not here

2010-10-04T22:31:00.001-04:00

Fuck it! Why am I seeing illusions… why? I need drugs…

I never knew the moon could be so blue

2010-09-27T22:51:00.001-04:00

這幾天不知道為什麼，這首歌一直在腦子裡嘴邊轉啊轉，想要跑出來

一些我們原本不知道的事情其實很多

比如Syd Barrett在唱："I don’t care if the sun don’t shine, I don’t care if nothing is mine” 的時候肯定沒有想到，幾十年後Billie Joe會同樣絕望的唱："I don’t care if you don’t care”

也比如我沒想到娘會這麼了解我，雖然在她說“是不是我說的話影響你了”的時候我沒有承認，但我心裡承認了

Across the Universe cover

2010-09-17T00:25:00.001-04:00

今天講些輕鬆的吧。

表哥結婚，爸媽要我錄像祝賀，表哥要我唱歌，那我就合二為一吧。多久沒碰的吉他又被我從床底下找出來了。真是難為他了

既然錄了，就把歌再錄一邊吧。沒規沒矩，一首典型的John Lennon song… 見笑了

I’d die right now for a day of Jim Morrison’s life

2010-09-11T16:41:00.001-04:00

September 11, the date that makes so many people tremble by simply looking at it. I know, we all know people wouldn’t forget this day. But for those who tweeted “God bless America”, what made you all think that people in other countries don’t need blessing? What made you believe that among all the lives that were lost on 9/11/2001, they were all Americans? Instead of let the patriotism fly, let the hatred grow, how many have indeed taken a look back and reflect?

Sometimes things are so simple if you look back and try to connect the dots.

It applies to any other country. Even more so to the one that I grew up in, that I’m bound to belong to, that I struggle to balance this hate-love feeling, that I spend time on reading every piece of news about it yet find it sliding further and further away.

This is the year of 2010, when natural disasters are happening more the more frequently and violently, when antibiotic resistant virus is being found and spread all around the world, when scientists are discovering that the moon is cooling down and shrinking. Nobody’s feeling guilty or threatened. The sun is assumed to rise up on the horizon the next day afresh.

So, what if we really look back? History does not make any sense sometimes.

Trivial examples. In the beginning of the year, year of 2010, everybody, including all the “experts”, was predicting that 2010 was to be the year of e-readers. It didn’t pan out quite as we expected, did it? In 1999, NBA fan vote predicted that Vince Carter would become the “Player of the Next Decade”. He vanished. In 2007, I swore life wouldn’t be the same without someone, I’d give it all away to get those days back. Then I hesitated.

We all did things like that. We all will do things like that.

If I come to think about it, this is probably only the 3^rd or 4^th September of my whole life that I’m not in school. Surprising fact. How many such Septembers do I have left? I don’t know. Nobody knows. Maybe nobody even wants to know.

Is tomorrow going to be a new day or just the same?

Gazing at the stars, can you really believe what you see is what happened billions of years ago? Those stars may not even be there any more at this moment. Everything has a start and an end. Life, earth, universe, time, and space.

We are all going nowhere. We won’t, and we can’t. We are not immortal.

I don’t want to be immortal.

Of A Broken Heart

2010-08-29T15:24:00.001-04:00

It’s been some while since I first bought this album and heard this song, and it’s one of the saddest and most helpless songs I’ve ever heard. Zwan, the name itself makes me think of a most innocent creature yet trapped with dark thoughts. It’s an angel and a devil at the same time, and is desperately crying for help.

If only i die
Just once in my life
If only to try
To take a guess, to be the best
A feeling i hide
That runs this world, that keeps us alive
I want you to climb with me

Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die

The heart of a child
Is in your hands now
So let's see you smile
'cause I'm not impressed with your loneliness
And it's been a while
Since you forgave all your changes made
So let's count the miles together

Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die

If only i die
Just once in my life
If only to try together

Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die of a broken heart
A broken heart
Until i die

The End

2010-08-25T23:32:00.001-04:00

I want acid, or drug, or alcohol… So I can get unconscious and worry free. So I can dance to this song like a lunatic…

This is the end
Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end

Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
Ill never look into your eyes...again

Can you picture what will be
So limitless and free
Desperately in need...of some...strangers hand
In a...desperate land

Lost in a roman...wilderness of pain
And all the children are insane
All the children are insane
Waiting for the summer rain, yeah

Theres danger on the edge of town
Ride the kings highway, baby
Weird scenes inside the gold mine
Ride the highway west, baby

Ride the snake, ride the snake
To the lake, the ancient lake, baby
The snake is long, seven miles
Ride the snake...hes old, and his skin is cold

The west is the best
The west is the best
Get here, and well do the rest

The blue bus is callin us
The blue bus is callin us
Driver, where you taken us

The killer awoke before dawn, he put his boots on
He took a face from the ancient gallery
And he walked on down the hall
He went into the room where his sister lived, and...then he
Paid a visit to his brother, and then he
He walked on down the hall, and
And he came to a door...and he looked inside
Father, yes son, I want to kill you
Mother...i want to...fuck you

Cmon baby, take a chance with us
Cmon baby, take a chance with us
Cmon baby, take a chance with us
And meet me at the back of the blue bus
Doin a blue rock
On a blue bus
Doin a blue rock
Cmon, yeah

Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill

This is the end
Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end

It hurts to set you free
But youll never follow me
The end of laughter and soft lies
The end of nights we tried to die

This is the end

“Show me which constellations you know”

2010-08-21T01:40:00.001-04:00

車上看到一對小愛人，挺恩愛的樣子。女生兩個無名指都帶著戒指，男生只有在左手中指上帶著一枚戒指

把一片塑料掐進手指，痛。但是摸起來是平的，完全沒有異物的感覺，似乎他們本來就是一體的。但他們其實不是。如果再想把塑料挖出來，還是痛，區別只是，手上留下了一個坑，現在還有痕跡

牆上兩張博物館的票據和兩張Toy Story的票根都已經開始褪色了，一副椰風擋不住的味道；但是有時候記憶的褪色卻是可以控制的

張震嶽在那唱著：“會微笑的秀發，在我手中睡著……”我彷彿回到了多年前；他又唱：“關於未來我沒有答案，我無法承諾……”我又回到了現實。其實他沒必要一直提醒我

新聞說證據表明月亮在縮小。原來我們對於月亮的認識已經到了很成熟的地步，即使付出了挑戰者號的代價；原來認識自己也是需要付出時間和代價的，只有認識到了自己的陰暗面才能拼成一個完整的月亮，才能退到遠處欣賞他的美麗，才能有美好的神話傳說

“如果道歉有用，要警察幹什么”我不知道哪裡聽到的這句話，但肯定不是我親耳聽到的。這麼無厘頭的話，也許只有我會說。但現在卻感受到了背後隱藏的無奈

做一個壞人是什么感覺；做一個壞人良心發現懺悔又是什么感覺。告訴你，你不想嘗試的，也不應該嘗試

乖小孩就早點洗洗睡吧，明天還有新的一天等我們。至少對我們來說，連太陽都是無限輪迴的，又何況是生活呢？就比如金凱利的電影，你看過的

Clem: “This is it Joel, it’s gonna be gone soon.”

Joel: “I know.”

Okay, I know how it goes in the movie, but I have my own answer.

“I guess this is it. Ended where it all started.”

The greatest war-themed game music

2010-06-27T01:44:00.001-04:00

這兩天一直有一首音樂在腦子裡轉，轉啊轉。每轉一回我就激動一回，每激動一回就發抖一回。現在終於有時間表達出來。

也許這個題目大了一點，但對我來說一點也不誇張。雖然我玩過戰爭題材的遊戲不多，但這一首絕對是經典。當然NES除外，和Contra也許還是不能比。

讓我先賣個關子，大家聽聽音樂先，跳轉後揭曉：

玩過的小朋友應該馬上就能聽出來，這是戰地1942(Battlefield 1942)的音樂。“Battlefield”不是重點，“1942”才是。整款遊戲的音樂並不多，僅有的幾段幾乎是這一首的變體。你能想像離1942的發行已經有8年了嗎？我不能。因為我第一次玩的時候大約已經是2004或2005年了。但是對於我當時的標準來說，這依然是一款“現代”的遊戲，用我當時的華碩跑起來仍然是速度不足，吃力有餘。但是這樣的好處就是，每次載入時間過長的時候我都能聽這段音樂。所以也許你沒有聽過完整的，聽的不耳熟，是因為你曾經用了太好的電腦。

當然我不敢在題目最後加上“ever”，我也不希望是ever。但是目前為止，這是我的選擇。

奉上音樂的Symphony版：

袁騰飛倒了，中國敢憑良心說真話的老師也倒了

2010-06-26T13:43:00.001-04:00

被稱為“最牛歷史老師”的袁騰飛被管了，不能說了，留下的只有以前的講課，不知道還能不能看到他出來上課。

附上袁騰飛語錄，希望他安好：

“獨裁的都是弱智，天天有人跟你說你萬歲你就真以為自個兒萬歲。什么東西才能萬歲？王八才萬歲呢！”

“毛這個人多二啊，治國無方，擾民有術，狗屁不懂的東西。毛肯定是不懂馬克思主義的，他又不懂英文，不懂德文，俄語也不懂，你看過馬克思主義的著作嗎？沒有。他看得最多的是《資治通鑒》，怎麼整人啊，怎麼玩人啊，中國古代的帝王的陰謀之術，他這個玩得爐火純青。毛別說在中國歷史上，在世界歷史上都是少見的暴君獨裁者。”

“毛澤東紀念堂不是不可以去，但你要記住那個紀念堂是靖國神社，裡面供奉的雙手沾滿人民鮮血的劊子手。”

“毛澤東說原子彈只能嚇唬神經衰弱的人，他給自己定位很正確。”

“毛澤東造原子彈不是為了保衛中國，而是為了保衛他屁股地下那把椅子。這和現在北朝鮮做的事情一樣，你擁護他嗎？那當年你也這德行，你为什么認為他對啊？原子彈還不如茶葉蛋有用呢，那好歹能果腹。你不造原子彈還能少餓死點兒人。”

“你說我造原子彈的目的是保衛國家不受侵略，可以避免遭受南京大屠殺。結果因為你造原子彈餓死的人比南京大屠殺死的多的多的多的多，那還是屠殺我們兩回吧！”

“'三年自然災害’中國死的人比二戰整個歐洲死的人還多。什么“自然災害”這麼嚴重啊？地震有汶川嚴重嗎？洪水有98年嚴重嗎？那幾年中國人口都是負增長，餓的都沒力氣生了。你跟我說中國人口負增長就跟你說你在火星上買房子一樣。”

另在跳轉後附上他的講課節選：

“Oops, ma bad!”

2010-06-22T02:28:00.001-04:00

It’s not often when you search someone’s pictures, almost all of them are portrait style. But this is the case when you search for “Manute Bol” (being as tall as 7’7”).

With Bol being the headline lately, I’m surprised that there is no news about him on the website of University of Bridgeport, as I clearly remember that he once attended UB (see Bol’s player profile on NBA.com) and there is a big poster of him in UB’s gym.

With people who has forgotten about him in all the year now summing up his career and life pretending that they know him well, Boing Boing is reporting that he is said to have popularized or even originated the phrase “My bad”, which I suspect would have been heard as “ma bad” as he spoke it.

Interesting theory. Might be worth digging though.

Continue reading on Boing Boing and the article from the Washington Post.

SOURCE: Boing Boing, the Washington Post.

Couple cool Hot Air Balloon renditions

2010-06-16T02:28:00.001-04:00

“If you suck at autotune, you suck.” says our lovable Sir Charles.

I haven’t been a big fan of techno and autotune music, but I came across Owl City and his Hot Air Balloon a while ago. Now I’m discovering several cool covers. It’s an adorable song, so are these covers. Enjoy =_@

“阿凡達”

2010-06-09T01:38:00.001-04:00

又一個抗拆維權的。在歌舞升平，SB開會的時候，這樣的新聞沒見過吧？

這位武漢的農民楊友德為了阻止拆遷隊強拆他的房子，自制了土炮，架起了塔樓，時刻準備和施工隊決斗。

這不是炒作也不是鬧劇。在投訴無門，無依無靠的時候，“人民政府”不辦人事的時候，人只能靠自己的力量來維護自己的權益。聽起來很英雄，其實是最無奈也是最悲劇的。就像楊友德自己說的一樣，有時候站在那上面，他也發抖。他不知道接下來的是什麼。是他被拉下來，是傷了別人坐牢，還是房子和土地都被推平——在後果出現之前，他說“我只能拼了”。

聯想到最近的傷人，自殘，跳樓事件，在環境和社會逼人作惡的時候，你能怪他們嗎？就像小時候我爸打我還不許我哭，有這么不講理的嗎？！

跳轉查看更多圖片

Warning sign at a BP gas station

2010-06-08T15:10:00.001-04:00

From Boing Boing. It’s said to be a warning sign at a BP gas station in Ohio. Apparently, it reads:

“Do not leave pumps unattended, you are responsible for spills.”

Um… now what do you call this? Irony?

Click on the links below to check out the article from Boing Boing and the original picture from Flikr.

VIA: Boing Boing
SOURCE: The Rachel Maddow Show's Flickr stream

Windows Live gets a different look, sort of

2010-06-07T22:39:00.001-04:00

If you have by any chance logged into Windows Live today, chances are you can already feel that it doesn’t feel as usual. The interface looks different, but you can’t really tell what it is. Head-scratching, isn’t it?

Sadly, it seems only the home page gets the better of the change. The reported Hotmail revamp is still nowhere to be found. But we can wait, I guess. If Microsoft has the patience to wait for all these years for Gmail to take over the world, why can’t I?

What I know about the iPhone 4

2010-06-07T20:54:00.001-04:00

1. It’s called iPhone 4, not 4G. Apple knows you are not going anywhere with 4G and AT&T in the same sentence, not when Verizon keeps saying “there’s a map for that” in the commercials.

2. It runs on the custom made A4 processor that also powers the iPad – which means that the iPad has now officially gained the status of a “giant iPhone”.

3. The screen accommodates 4 times the pixel numbers of iPhone 3GS, which Apple claims to be “beyond the human eye's limit of distinction”. Which also means that it might look the same as one that’s within the human eye’s limit distinction to a mortal person, but they’ll tell you anyway, to make you feel that you are getting more.

4. If you own an iPhone 3GS now, you probably will upgrade and be stuck with AT&T. Because once you give up that $30 unlimited data plan, you’ll never get it back.

5. Speaking of upgrade, it’s said that iPhone owners have already been receiving messages from AT&T about early upgrade to iPhone 4. You are given mercy so stop complaining! That’s what they’ll say. Or they’ll see you in the court.

6. Apple’s new mobile OS is now called iOS 4, which they were permitted to use by Cisco. I said this several times, and I don’t mind saying it again: PATENT EVERYTHING IN THE DICTIONARY WITH AN “i” IN THE FRONT! For example, iCan, iCan-Opener, iCan’t-Open-It, iToilet, iToilet-Paper, iToilet-Paper-Holder. Because apparently, when they want a name, they’ll buy.

7. IPhone 4 has a front-facing camera and is capable of video calling… Wait, wait, wait, don’t get too hyped yet. It only performs video calling under Wi-Fi. You know who you dealing with, don’t you? AT&T. Get that tethering feature from last generation to work properly first fellas!

8. So if you have high expectations now, you’d better calm down for a while. If you are with AT&T and have a lot of dropped calls, chances are that you are still going to have a ton of them with the iPhone 4; and if you are not with AT&T, good for you!

9. But don’t feel disappointed either, because I have not mentioned the greatest part of the iPhone 4, which is “it can stand by itself to do self portraits from several feet away”. How cool is that?!

10. Another “more” biggest takeaway, Stevie Jobs is still alive and is still looking to take over the world.

So… um… will you get the iPhone 4 is you are not currently an iPhone owner?

(Jane Lynch’s iPhone 4 parody video after the jump)

留学生驾飞机携巨型横幅盘旋中领馆，要求平反六四

2010-06-06T11:32:00.002-04:00

6月4日下午，几位留学生开飞机从中国驻纽约领事馆上空飞过，以纪念和抗议六四。其中飞行员是是在1989年出生的。天安门四君子之一的周舵也参加了飞行。他们在低空拉起横幅：

“昭雪六四，结束专制，人民必胜，良知永存！河蟹，草泥马喊你从中国滚蛋！”

跳转后观看视频。

This is how the iPad should have been

2010-06-06T01:17:00.003-04:00

This is fake by the way. But it looks a hundred times cooler than the real thing.

原来他们读的不是“新”闻

2010-06-06T00:05:00.007-04:00

在Boing Boing上看到这个有趣的事情，原来几十年以来，我们在荧幕里看到的报纸都是一样的。猜测是：为了避免知识产权的纠纷，他们“创造”出了这一份所有内容都不会有产权问题的报纸。上面的截图分别是：左上，Desperate Housewives - 2x13；右上，No Country for Old Men；左下，Scrubs - 8x04；右下，Married with children 11x24。

点击来源查看更多图片。

VIA: Boing Boing
SOURCE: Crossoverek (újság)

十五万

2010-06-04T17:21:00.006-04:00

HTC EVO 4G终于开卖了。不过这不是在门口排队的人数，也不是我想要说的话题。

这是昨天晚上，或者说是今天早上，在维园参加纪念活动的人数。活动内容大家也都猜的到，我也不用这么直白。

对很多人来说，今天他们21岁，因为他们重生或者说是逃生了21年；但对更多的人来说，今天是他们第21个忌日，因为他们不觉得自己现在活着，甚至不希望自己到现在还活着；当然，对于绝大多数的人来说，今天不过是儿童节的三天后，高考的三天前，或者不过是一个普通的星期五。

“原来今天是六四，翻墙才能说这么普通的一句话。”一个几乎从来不出现的朋友在twitter上说。在杭州自娱自乐的开六月二日的玩笑的时候，有几个想到，21年前这一天，四君子开始绝食了，军队开始进城了？又有几个知道，就在他们开玩笑的时候，有多少人的身边开始出现“监护人”陪同了？有多少普普通通的个人网站开始受到普通黑客无法完成的攻击了？

对，你们是良民，你们爱国。

跳转听歌：

（歌：没有烟抽的日子；词：王丹；曲：张雨生）

你值多少钱？

2010-06-02T02:20:00.001-04:00

看了Harvard的Justice讲座，讲到福特为了节约成本，比较了给车安装安全装置的花费和发生事故所要赔偿的费用，最后决定不安装安全装置。这让我想到了会计课上Fair Value和Stock Option的那些Model。大家都知道市面流通的产品的价格，比如股票价格，打开报纸就知道了。但如果是不流通的产品，不能转让的期权呢？除了自己，对于别人没有任何价值的东西呢？同样，你的生命值多少钱，兴趣爱好又值多少钱？

试想象，如果让你冒生命危险去救一个人，或者去杀一个人，你最低愿意接受多少钱的回报呢？这个价格每个人都是不一样的。街上的流浪汉也许愿意接受1000元的价格，而一个富豪却可能多高的价格都不会冒险。同理，我们每每听到的精神赔偿案，其中的数额又是怎么决定的。是不是每一件都是由法官的主观判断作为依据的？

所以我想，既然不能转让的期权能够通过一个模型估算价格，那么人的生命，快乐，痛苦是不是也能由某一个方程来估价？比如，方程中的变量包括年龄，收入，工作，种族，国籍，健康状况，家庭等等。这样，我们也许可以建立一个更公正，客观的科学价值观。

当然，一定有人会说，人的生命是无价的，无论如何都不能用金钱来衡量人的生命。是这样吗？

Everybody’s fighting for a promised land

2010-05-19T11:25:00.001-04:00

(*Try to watch the video with music on)

Song: Civil War – Guns n Roses

"What we've got here is failure to communicate.
Some men you just can't reach...
So, you get what we had here last week,
which is the way he wants it!
Well, he gets it!
N' I don't like it any more than you men." *

Look at your young men fighting
Look at your women crying
Look at your young men dying
The way they've always done before

Look at the hate we're breeding
Look at the fear we're feeding
Look at the lives we're leading
The way we've always done before

My hands are tied
The billions shift from side to side
And the wars go on with brainwashed pride
For the love of God and our human rights
And all these things are swept aside
By bloody hands time can't deny
And are washed away by your genocide
And history hides the lies of our civil wars

D'you wear a black armband
When they shot the man
Who said "Peace could last forever"
And in my first memories
They shot Kennedy
I went numb when I learned to see
So I never fell for Vietnam
We got the wall of D.C. to remind us all
That you can't trust freedom
When it's not in your hands
When everybody's fightin'
For their promised land

And
I don't need your civil war
It feeds the rich while it buries the poor
Your power hungry sellin' soldiers
In a human grocery store
Ain't that fresh
I don't need your civil war

Look at the shoes your filling
Look at the blood we're spilling
Look at the world we're killing
The way we've always done before
Look in the doubt we've wallowed
Look at the leaders we've followed
Look at the lies we've swallowed
And I don't want to hear no more

My hands are tied
For all I've seen has changed my mind
But still the wars go on as the years go by
With no love of God or human rights
'Cause all these dreams are swept aside
By bloody hands of the hypnotized
Who carry the cross of homicide
And history bears the scars of our civil wars

"We practice selective annihilation of mayors
And government officials
For example to create a vacuum
Then we fill that vacuum
As popular war advances
Peace is closer" **

I don't need your civil war
It feeds the rich while it buries the poor
Your power hungry sellin' soldiers
In a human grocery store
Ain't that fresh
And I don't need your civil war
I don't need your civil war
I don't need your civil war
Your power hungry sellin' soldiers
In a human grocery store
Ain't that fresh
I don't need your civil war
I don't need one more war

I don't need one more war
What’s so civil 'bout war anyway

U of Bridgeport dropout makes sandwich, while its graduate does carbombing for fun

2010-05-04T23:36:00.001-04:00

At long last, U of Bridgeport received national focus. Well deserved, at least considering it has now one famous person that does not make sandwiches and oddly enough graduated. Or maybe he IS the most famous one, if that sandwich guy is famous at all.

So next time you drive by this lil’ town, you’ll know it’s not famous for nothing. It has a garage that knows how to tint car windows, car sellers that don’t hand over cars on site, and a university that graduates everybody.

News articles report the guy took classes at Southeastern University, which lost its accreditation last year, and received D’s, B’s and C’s. I wonder if he still awarded with straight A’s from UB.

Just curious, people can inform me on that matter.

Ça va? Oui, très bien!

2010-05-03T02:13:00.001-04:00

I talk to myself in the mirror.

While in fact maybe I’m not.

I’m quietly drifting along the perimeter waiting for the ball to come my way to take the shot. But even if I was wide open, it’d be a long shot, and there is no such rule as goaltending.

I once read an article. The author was asked to pick a weapon in a personality test. He picked rifle and to be a sniper. The test declared that he is cunning and dangerous. It surprised him, and surprised me as well.

I would have chosen to be a sniper too, without even any second thought.

But it’s not because I’m a dangerous person that tries to harm people without being discovered. It’s because I feel insecure too, just as those people fall into my finder.

Or maybe I don’t like contact, like I always do when playing basketball. It’s a subconscious thing that’s flowing in my blood. Even when playing video game, I tend not to take contacts but shoot long range.

And certainly, you can argue, that’s what differentiate an MVP and his supporting cast. Obviously, I’m the latter.

So, how does it feel again?

A blink of an eye

2010-04-17T01:23:00.001-04:00

Things are getting rather weird lately. Weird… both inside and around me.

I find myself constantly referring to Jim Morrison’s quote: “All games contain the idea of death.”… which proves that life itself is a game. I don’t know how my logic gets me there. Only this game can’t be saved or loaded or started over.

It’s not Grand Theft Auto that you play by your own rules and your cheat codes; and it’s also not Super Mario Brothers in NES that only has one goal and two outcomes, fail or prevail.

Some take it seriously like there is no tomorrow; but some take it unconsciously like they live in tomorrow. Some work their asses off for things they know nothing about; while some don’t need to move their asses at all. Some become others’ talk; some talk about how others become their talk.

There are geniuses and dumbasses, but there are always way more dumbasses acting like geniuses, geniuses acting like lunatics, and lunatics acting like dumbasses. It’s a paradox.

But when you look up at the sky in the night, seeing the blurring stars, don’t you feel overwhelmed? You can’t breathe when think of the enormity of the universe and that you are just trapped in a grain of sand. What on earth are we fighting for? We struggle against whatever real or surreal, but in the end, life is just a blink of an eye. In the universe, it is literally a blink of an eye.

And we are alone.

@Slash

2010-03-26T23:21:00.001-04:00

Hey Slash, I don’t know if you’ll ever get to read this, but I need to tell you a story.

First of all, I assume you know how the Internet runs in China, at least with all publicity of Google lately: some bunch of big freaking control maniac communists trying to oversee everything you do and say. YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter are all blocked and inaccessible. But anyway, one of my best friends is the biggest fan of you and Guns n Roses I’ve ever seen in China. One day when he did manage to take a peek out of the freaking so-called Great Fire Wall and set up an account on twitter, he was surprised to find you and Sebastian Bach also on twitter.

He then said something that made me thinking: “You know Rock n Roll is dead when Slash and Bash are playing twitter.” It’s still echoing in my mind to this day.

Update:

Slash: Haha! If Twitter would have been around in the 80's it would have been huge!! Do u know how much pussy & drugs u could get?

I’m a bust

2010-03-04T01:14:00.001-05:00

I’ve always been a bust, a big bust, since the beginning of time, just as this kid above.

And it would not make any difference to me even I don’t like him, and even after I realize it.

My mind always goes the other direction as of my action, so did his.

I still remember listening to Citizen Cope’s song when riding in a train running in the snow land. The laziness of his voice and the laziness of my nature always make a good pair.

I don’t why I am so obsessed of being idle and doing nothing at all but just staring at the snow blowing at my window with nobody in sight.

I’m not a lonely person that always feels so, but the more I’m with the crowd, the more I want to be alone.

I believe I’m morally and socially a good person, but maybe, as I now realize, not a useful person as I’d thought before. Again, maybe just like him

I don’t want to ordinary, but again, maybe that’s who I am and I will be. That might be the difference between me and him.

And the other difference, he is fortunate.

Let me say it again, you knew it’s going to be a tragedy before it even started…

’round and ’round

2010-02-17T00:24:00.001-05:00

You always want to listen to music as slow as sticky and as old as this in such white and wet days – although the meaning of the lyrics might be totally irrelevant… or… is it?

When people and friends start asking you questions about love and marriage and lifelong commitment, you would kind of sense what’s next coming your way – it’s your turn! Busted!

It’s almost always the case that you’ll never realize the importance of things or people until you are without them. Just like I do now. I’m like a walking example, a bad one.

That’s why you’d be trying to tell them everything you can now, just to be different this time, at least for once.

Things change, so do perceptions, and they will, for sure.

Getting back to the opening topic, you hope you are making the right decision. When you look back 30, 50 years from now, you wouldn’t regret for what you’ve been through.

I know that, for me, I do. I do regret some silly stupid boyish small or not so small things that I did, and I wish I could go back and change it. But that probably wouldn’t change anything.

As I always said, the story has barely begun, and you already know that it’s going to be a sad one, and you can do nothing about it.

That’s about as frustrating and desperate as it can get.

Happy Birthday (something suppose to go here but I can’t think of any)

2010-01-06T02:03:00.001-05:00

I’m crazy.

I am.

The only connection is an icon that lights or dims reversely as to the sunlight. It’s just a simple click away but I always have great trouble to.

But happy birthday anyway, even if it means nothing, which I don’t think is the case. But… who knows.

It always frustrates me when I have the desire to do something but unable to, like sending out a present. If only things are that simple that I can just send things over the internet. Well, that’s the ONLY way. All I know is an address that is virtually non-existent.

On the Web, we are everywhere, and we are nowhere. It’s a new found neverland that could never be found.

Just as I said, I would have been an alcoholic and a poet if I had the talent, and a drug addict if I didn’t.

Unfortunately, I’m the latter.

And even more unfortunately, I’m drunk.

‘Nuff is ‘nuff

2010-01-02T13:27:00.001-05:00

When I say my wish is world peace, I mean WORLD PEACE.

Prophet on a Subway Wall

2009-12-31T12:08:00.001-05:00

Random thoughts, New Year’s Eve, 2009.

Today is said to be “the last day of this decade”. But I can hardly feel anything, just like I did ten years ago. If not for the “Twenty First Century” that people have been massively talked about and dreamed about, I would have stayed at home and doing some irrelevant things. But still, I did not do any “relevant” things, either.

With things progressing, it becomes more clear that I wouldn’t be doing any “relevant” things again. People are already summarizing this past embarrassing decade, and attach it with tags like “worst”; and messages of regret and sadness are flying around in Facebook. Maybe I should as well take a close look back.

But before I do, and everybody does, we should all know that it is easy to look back and comment on things that happened in the past. You are the prophet that never fails when you look back, and things like “I should have bought Citibank’s stock last year” are totally irrelevant.

So if we look back at the prediction and reality, we can feel the power of time: Vince Carter was predicted to be the “Player of the Next Decade” back in 1999, but things shook up different than most people thought.

While we are aware of all these, let’s take some time and write our wishes and prediction on a wall, on a paper and see what really happens.

冬眠

2009-12-22T01:06:00.001-05:00

兔子该躲回窝了，老出来晃悠什么。暖化至于这么严重么。要晃悠去哥本哈根，说热的你都睡不着了

考试总是让人很头痛，想到一把年纪还考试就更头痛

但我想不明白的是，为什么一把年纪了还有这么多想要的东西，小朋友才喊着要这要那的，我凑什么热闹

真想回到大一，天真地装潇洒，弄表演弄乐队什么的，搞的挺像那么回事。Beyond，花儿，红日，什么1984的，随你们唱什么，爱啥啥，我不管了，咱能装就行。看着照片那时候的照片，我纳闷了，后面打鼓那哥们儿谁呢？怎么一点都想不起来有这么一号人物，还傻傻的东张西望，我哪找来的。对，你，就说你呢，你谁啊

算了，咱还是现实一点，随缘吧，只要法号不是梦遗，咱出家都无所谓，就是实诚。2002年第一次听Green Day，2003年第一次听Blink-182，现在在 Youtube 上看到那些小孩儿在喊什么 21st Century Breakdown 是我第一次听Green Day什么什么的，我心里这得瑟的

咱就是看的开，不然这么多不顺的事儿我早就疯了

最后再说一句，FUCK AT&T!

谁让你每次都让我傻了吧唧的拿着电话往天上乱晃找信号，人还以为我奥特曼呢

还有，奥特曼竟然叫 Ultraman，真像安全套的名字，更傻了吧唧的；而且他们老妈老爸叫 Ultra Father 和 Ultra Mother，生了这么多，真够ULTRA的

换首 Ozzy Osbourne 的 Goodbye to Romance，难得他有这种歌

别理我，我烦着呐

2009-11-20T23:38:00.001-05:00

Google Earth image on December 27, 2003

刚听到EJ说了一句话，把我震惊了，愣了很久:

-- "It’s only 40 days away from the end of this DECADE.”

现在再看那些当年亲眼看到的回放，总是有一种不知道哪里来的冲动。

回想起来，10年之前，我不是25-10=15岁，而是17岁。其实虚岁这回事情，小时候看来再正常不过。只有扳着手指等生日的时候才会想起周岁。但是不知道从什么时候，开始不愿意承认+2的年龄，开始像一个小女生一样希望年龄小一点，再小一点。

10年之前，还是花儿让我无线向往的时候，还是大张伟是“智慧少年”的时候，还是花鸟鱼虫的时候；也是无限叛逆看哪个老师都不顺眼的时候；还是每天晚上听朴树的时候；也是每天不厌其烦的弹难听的棉花憧憬着大学没人管的时候

总之，听完EJ说了那句话，马上去投了2001年AI的48分。

其实AI就是个长不大的不愿面对现实的小孩。其实我们大家都是

桌上的空酒瓶怎么变成两个了，我又喝高了吧

Vois Sur Ton Chemin (Look upon your path)

2009-11-14T14:36:00.001-05:00

今天想写点无病呻吟的。

音乐这个东西很神奇，本来很平淡很没有惊喜的电影，加了音乐就完全不一样了。比如昨天又看的Les Choristes (The Chorus)，故事其实没什么新意，但是每次听到Morhange唱歌我就特激动。我是说，特，激动。看的我想把大学的法语书翻出来再学一遍了。

不过其实也让我想到了其他事情。

每次上国内的论坛，只要是有人发表观点的，不同意的人说的第一句话肯定是“XXX”，就那三个字。每次都让我很心寒。我不敢说我是以国家兴亡为己任的人，但看着老爸勤勤恳恳当了一辈子教师，看他的起起落落，总是有点潜移默化的效果。虽然我对他的教育方式有不同的意见，但是他说的事到现在回头看，还没有发现我不同意的地方。

回到网络的事情。我不是对说脏话骂人的人愤怒，我是对中国的教育绝望。回头所有受过的教育，印象深刻的是XYZ，牛顿，摩尔，作文，考试，记得的是语文老师严肃的警告我高考不要写批判的文章，从没有记得有哪个老师语重心长的告诉我如何做人，或者问我长大的理想是什么。结果就是我没有理想。我不知道我是谁。

前两天看到传说中的钱学森之问：中国什么时候才能培养出世界性的人才？

我想问，中国什么时候能有一个世界性的文学家和教育家？

Je ne sais pas…

早上喝的酒精开始发挥作用了，不说了，有兴趣的朋友看个trailer吧

So you think you can tell

2009-11-05T21:42:00.001-05:00

I’m not going insane. But if I am, maybe it’s the way how it supposed to be.

No, I can’t tell.

So can you help me build the wall?

You’re very welcome.

What’s the deal?

2009-11-02T02:19:00.001-05:00

So what was the deal? Heaven, or Hell?

Frankly, I’m not a big fan of birthday parties and surprises and all that, but that was the most surprising birthday I ever had.

My parents don’t normally remember my birthday, and really, birthday doesn’t mean that much to me. I can still remember that we used to have some discussion about me and my older cousin’s birthdays. Up until some age (don’t remember), I used to have birthday on 11/4 and he used to have it on 12/3. Only because that our parents didn’t remember the dates! At least not until they decided to take a look at the birth certificate and the records from hospital.

But still, it doesn’t mean to me that much. I don’t feel I’m old, not inside. But the appearance? I don’t know.

Sure I would like to travel back and live my life all over again. I’d figure out a way to be a better son, a better student, a better friend (maybe with a prefix as well), and a better man that takes responsibility more seriously. Maybe I’d socialize and behave myself better. Maybe I’d also be not so cynical and anti-mainstream, listen to 张信哲任贤齐周杰伦 and I’d be perfectly fine.

But until the next Einstein comes around, I’d better be looking forward. Looking forward to things that are not so clear to me, or not clear to me at all. Things like how I’d be like in 10 year, or 5, or maybe one year or even 6 months. No answer, and nobody could.

Halloween is the time for Sopor’s music. “窗外”is right, time goes fast, she can still remember this time last year. I can, too. Even the minor details of putting last year’s Halloween blog post together at night, and that I got fascinated by Anna’s appearance and her experience and feeling about death and the rest of the world, as I read about “Out Of Body Experience”. And I did it again last night! Maybe I have a dark and uninhabited corner inside.

People born and people die, but the world still moves on. I believe in the theory that people’s spirit stays when they die and it would be reborn. Whether you’d be man, woman, rich, poor, or simply a common animal, your consciousness stays.

But that’s way off the topic, even though I don’t know what my topic is right now.

But maybe, it was all destined to be so that I can’t run away from. I was destined to be like this, to be disappointing, to be somewhat lucky, and somewhat unlucky, and to be me.

The story has barely started, you can already tell that it is going to be a tragedy. You can see it coming and can’t do anything about it. All you can do is just to wait. Wait for it to come, wait for your turn.

So what was the deal that I had with the Master before I came?

The Song Remains the Same

2009-10-21T00:33:00.001-04:00

每个人总有那么几首歌听到就想起以前听的场景。我有很多这样的歌。小时候听磁带的时候那些歌的顺序就记得很清楚，甚至于觉得这首歌后面很自然就应该跟那首，后来开始听CD有了shuffle的功能反而不习惯。比如我觉得其实不想走完了以后马上就应该出现八音盒的声音和风雨无阻的旋律

又比如前天晚上的梦，给人唱那些花儿，仿佛觉得自己是在高一，那天半夜起床坐在阳台上弹，接下去的事情就是爸妈都出现了

还比如刚才电脑换到了Citizen Cope的歌，房间马上就变成了火车厢，我在CT的雪天里看着窗外发呆，不知道自己要去什么地方

还有Freebird，每次听到都很激动，没有一次例外，似乎觉得键盘前突然出现了小强的毛巾和阵雨的参合，似乎觉得大学四年所有的回忆就只有这个游戏和另外那件事

花儿，听到他们解散的消息我很开心，一个时代，或者说是我的一个时代，总算是结束了。虽然我从来没有去证实过这个消息。就像Clash唱的那样，Death or glory, become just another story… 米高积逊活着的时候似乎人们对他有太多不好的消息，甚至South Park也捉弄他爱和小孩玩的事。但是现在的情况就是另外一个故事了，他immortal了。

我已经完全把花儿和过去和那些事情连起来，放起来，也许暂时搁一搁了

……只是，the song still remains the same… just people don’t.

Maybe, I still wish you were here… or I were there.

Wish You Were Here

2009-10-18T22:09:00.001-04:00

又冷又干，那天喝完酸辣汤去厕所，发现撒的和汤是一个颜色的。然后我就想起twitter上有人转的：我就在明尼苏达，已经下了两场雪了，除了喝酒什么娱乐都没有，如果我是卢比奥我也不来。反正就是这天气让人一片绝望，本来就够绝望的了

昨天见到有人往LG那个手机的透明键盘里装进了两条小鱼，我就在想，草皮看见大概又要一个月睡不着了。超超最近很消沉，草皮又老是喊没劲。其实我也没劲，不过总有点光明吧，大家看开点

还有这两老做梦，连着两天梦到同一个人，自己都不知道怎么回事。你说我还那啥啥的？不觉得。真不知道怎么回事

没什么说的了，什么twitter, facebook, 校内的，把我平时想说的话都说完了，让我怎么混

就这样吧，如果什么都不用想不用做，只待屋子里，听这样让人没力气的小歌儿，做些没力气的小事儿，冷就冷吧，只是wish you were here.

写到这里，电脑很自觉的换到了这首歌

I got hexie’d

2009-10-01T00:44:00.001-04:00

十月一号原来不知不觉这么快就到了。我不是关心这个日子，也不是关心这个日子的历史以及和它有关的事件，只是刚才给KPMG的杭州Office写信，收到自动回复说1号到8号全国都休息，我才意识到，原来时间过的这么快。

上了网才发现大家状态一片红（什么时候股市也这样？），所以我想也凑个热闹吧。找到浙江卫视，看了五分钟，没到，我就看不下去了。阅兵，我一个兵都没有看到，都是群众演员，演残疾的演生病的什么都有。我不是泼冷水，只是觉得大家都太激动了一点，或者只能说爱国主义教育做的好。“万岁”，恕我愚钝，就我所知这是对皇帝的称呼，那么被称万岁的是不是要自称“朕”呢？或者“寡人”？当然，我看不下去还有一个原因，中央台主持人的音调我听不得，大概新闻联播看的不够多吧，爸妈没教育好，我只能这么解释。

所以既然饿了，就去扒冰箱吧，回来看到画面上竟然出现了人海拼成的6个字“维护世界和平”，我差点喷了，我是说真的。连崔西为什么要从1号换到3号的原因都不敢说的地方，维护什么呢？小时候总是听到大家酸溜溜的说“美国人是太平洋的警察，管的宽”，现在换到自己想要管人了，只是不敢在外面张扬，晚上咱被窝里躲着跟自家娘子说说就得了。

不过好处还是有的，就是听到了一些小时候才听到过的歌，一些都不知道叫什么名字的歌，什么进行曲或者什么红领巾七八点钟的太阳之类的歌。说到这里我又觉得大概小时候没教育好，最讨厌有人告诉我要做什么，除了爸妈。

那天听NYU那些学生在唱黄河大合唱，唱到青纱帐里游击英雄逞英豪，我突然想到，那个时候的打游击的是不是和现在伊拉克那些所谓“恐怖分子”一个性质？

这个缺少爆炸新闻的年代，中国还是提供了不少娱乐的。比如光是围绕中国就有很多人在操心。共产党就不提了，还有什么藏独的东突的法拉盛街头招摇的法轮功的还有民运的什么号称八九传人的，什么都有。每天总有点什么事。

不过写到这里，让我惊讶的事情出现了，电视里竟然说阅兵结束了，我一看，才12点30，真的很快。不过我们的小胡马上就出来穿个中山装（从来没见他穿过）说一串“万岁”，当然，他也没忘记把共产党先给整万岁了再让人民也多活个一万年。但是一万年是不是还不够点呐，现在唱歌都是拿万年数的，爱个人也要一万年，还不够我活的呐。

好啦不写了，这个地方也封了，写这么多谁看呢？其实我也不是网上老提起的Dissent，我这人实诚，很容易满足，网络少管管我就歌功颂德了，连带不封我网站了。您要是行行好还我99BBS我就天天去灵隐寺烧香了，您爱抓谁抓谁爱判谁判谁，我还不管了，爱咋咋地吧！

I’m back… kind of…

2009-09-21T01:24:00.001-04:00

Okay, I hate Facebook and Twitter and both apps on the phone. They’ve deserted my blog for a while, and it’s a BIG while.

Let’s see what happened…

Zune HD is out and very promising. HTC Leo is HOT with 4.3 inch capacitive touch screen and accelerometer. Microsoft is planning its own smartphone handset with Project Pink. Expectations are high, way high. They’ve managed to make me almost forget Storm 2 and N900, which have been both going in and out of our sight like shy girlies for TOOO long, and I’m getting tired of waiting for them.

I’ve been thinking what kind of business I would be starting. I wish it’s a tech company, like one that develops a new web browser, and I already have some ideas for a browser… only if I knew how to write one myself. See, I should’ve been gone for a computer science major or something like that.

Or… I could start a music label, and I already have the name: Moss Record. How’s that? Just like the song would sing: “Moss grows fat on a rolling stone…” Rock is dead! We all know it.

And the story thing… I wish I had the time to write. Don’t even have the time to think for myself recently, and don’t even know what I’ve been busy doing. It’s like my body and my time don’t even belong to myself. It used to be at the time when I used to daydream a lot and doing nothing, but I don’t have the time to do it any more. I lost my creativity.

Just like I said, I lost my creativity and I don’t know how to continue this post. Guess I’ll just let it end here.

Z’s Trilogy / My Very Own Musical Opera (The Story, Episode 2)

2009-07-29T00:21:00.001-04:00

5. 再见理想

高中末和大学初的时候突然喜欢听Beyond。虽然至今仍有人们争论，说他们玩的根本不是摇滚，但是不管怎么说，在那个了解不多的时候，我把他们当作救命稻草，而且我知道，至少他们自己觉得他们还真是那么回事。就像后来我老是看到五月天登台领奖的时候第一句话就是“玩摇滚乐。。。”云云，我真不知道说他们什么好。

其实那个时候不知道“理想”究竟是个什么东西，只是觉得“一起高呼Rock n’ Roll”喊起来特有一种苦大仇深的味道。

说起Beyond，吉他老师有一次提到他们，很自然的顺口而出“那个黄家狗。。。”，一点没有开玩笑的意思。。。我至今还不知道他到底是不是在开玩笑

但是不管怎么说，“那个黄家狗”把我唱到了大学里

6. Time of Your Life

2003，在一个音响店找到一张Green Day的Shenanigans，后来就开始喜欢听他们的歌，一是旋律和节奏的确很悦耳，尤其在我还不懂得朋克的时候，二是没人听，必须承认，我喜欢做没人做的事。所以到后来出现了American Idiot，歌还是一样的好听，只是我不再跟人说我喜欢听Green Day，因为大街小巷都有他们的影子

回到2003，有一个下午我抱着吉他跑到皮特的房间里，给他听Time of Your Life，我问他有没有听过，他说没有，我说你有没有这歌的谱，他说等等。听了几句，拿我吉他捣鼓了几下，就给我写了我后来一直用的谱。说实话，他是我见过最接近音乐家的人

7. 静止

也许没人明白为什么现在才出现静止，但是在2004那一年，静止对我的意义比什么歌都大。

大概Kraze或者阵雨知道个大概。

事情是，那天在他们学院的晚会上唱了静止以后，过了几天有一个陌生的号码发短信问我，听说你有花儿的CD，能不能借我听听，我是XX。

故事就这么发生了

(つづく……)

We all need to pee sometimes

2009-07-21T12:27:00.001-04:00

Guess I’ve posted it somewhere and sometime before, but I’ll do it again before I continue my narration.

And for Kraze, we are not a cover band. We are a tribute band. I know “Life” is just the same old song, and the original version is already damn tasty enough to listen to. But we don’t copy. We don’t copy anyone else’s version, and we don’t do it as how anyone else tell us to. We recreate it ourselves, the version of our own.

……

[Timothy] A long, long time ago...
                  ...when I was at university...
                  ...l was married.

[Izzy]         No. You were married?

[Tim]         It was before you boys and that rock 'n' roll music corrupted me, man.
                   Yeah, I still think about it sometimes.
                   She was really a very sweet girl.

[Izzy]          What happened? lf you don't mind me asking.

[Tim]          No, no.
                   One day we were sitting in the park.
                   Having lunch, me and the wife.
                   I needed to take a piss...
                   ...so I walked to the toilet. You know, in the bathroom.
                   I'm standing there staring at the wall, as you do.
                   And all of the sudden, something came over me.
                   Like a fear that my whole life had already been laid out for me.
                   I'd finish my studies, get a job.
                   I'd be working for somebody else...
                   ...worrying about things that didn't matter.
                   So I walked out of there.
                   I Kept going. Didn't come back.

[Izzy]          You just left her there?

[Tim]          Yep.
                   Sitting in front of a half-eaten steak and kidney pie.
                   Very harsh, man.
                   She came to see a show a few years ago. She hadn't changed at all.
                   She married my best friend. A doctor.
                   They have three gorgeous little kids.
                   Yeah, she's very happy.
                   Very happy.

……

Z’s Trilogy / My Very Own Musical Opera (The Story, Episode 1)

2009-07-16T02:03:00.002-04:00

1. 再见，二十世纪（序）

那时候对于新世纪有两种说法，一说1999年12月31号那天应该倒数，又一说2001年1月1号才开始新的世纪。但是不管怎么说，反正他是来了。在被“亲爱的祖国”“敬爱的老师”忽悠了十多年“做二十一世纪的接班人”之后，他终于来了。

记得99年最后一天那个晚上，和很少的几个同学出去玩，忘了去哪里玩了，只记得最后回家的时候载着一个漂亮的女生……

2. 外面的世界

2000年8月，暑假，我开始了九年学也学不会唱也唱不好买了积灰尘看着心痒痒的过程。那天老师第一次来我家，拿着我十二品的红棉就唱了同桌的你。那时候的我哪见过这个架势，立马就震惊了。

基本的程序走过以后，学的第一首歌就是兰花草。不是因为这歌有什么特别的意义，只不过因为他只有Am和Em两个最简单的和弦。后来我渐渐在老师那里听到了他唱的来自我心和恋恋风尘，倒不是因为这些歌有多好听（免得草皮又要嘲笑我），只是那些歌总是有些时间和空间的味道。也是因为这些歌，那时候对大学总是有股特别的憧憬，虽然后来现实告诉我那些都是幻想……

不过话说回来，那两三年最成功还是外面的故事。以至于到后来大一，“皮特”来借音箱的时候说这是我弹的最好的

3. 花

其实我有些滞后，高中才听到了当时名噪一时的“花儿”和大张伟。那时候我总是下意识的把大张伟和韩寒联系起来。韩寒说一哥们儿叫杨伟，叫了十几年，他老爸有一天终于觉悟，觉得杨伟这名字怎么听怎么不对劲，决定给他改名字。本来是一无比正确的决定，结果他那不开窍的老爸偏偏又堵了，给改名叫做杨大伟。我看到这段的时候立马就想到大张伟了。

那时候对花儿又可以说是无比迷恋，用现在的话说叫做有才，不过那时候语言没那么丰富，形容起来总是要一大堆辞藻。印象里面，好多学生乐队那个时候都是从模仿花儿开始的。

直到很多年以后在书店老远看到一张大张伟封面的CD，毫不犹豫就买下了。回来听了以后才发现，封面上那个穿着粉色衣服的人已经不是我原来听到的那个了……

4. 活着

这歌我记得曾经提起过。一次上课默写，我不会，就装着写这歌的歌词，但是最后还是被老师发现了……

说到朴树，我就要想到万恶的文理科制度。我不知道我当时为什么想读文科，也不知道我是不是适合读文科，也不知道想读文科的动机是不是纯洁，反正在高一结束的时候我报了文科。记得有一个男生很肯定的对我说，看着吧，下学期你还是会回到这里来的。

我从来不喜欢被人看透，也不喜欢被人猜中结果，也不喜欢被人看出心思，但是不管怎么说，到了高二的时候我果然还是坐在了理科班的教室里……因为老爸在开学前几天去学校帮我改了

不知道是为什么（大概我知道，只是说不清楚），那时候天天都是朴树，整天听他那个苦大仇深的哭腔，以至于有一天半夜睡不着，起来去阳台弹那些花儿，惊的爸妈齐齐从楼下跑上来问我怎么半夜唱歌不睡觉，那叫一个尴尬……

但是后来电视上出现了一个丰田的广告和背景的歌曲唱着“It’s all my way~ It’s all my way~ all the colorful days~”，我又意识到，朴树也消失了……

不过我也明白了一个道理，对我来说，喜欢一件东西，或者是一个人，都不可能是长久的。我喜欢只是他们现在的样子，是how they are，而不是who they are。当他们改变的时候，我也许就不喜欢了……

(つづく……)

Z’s Trilogy / My Very Own Musical Opera (Origin, Episode 2)

2009-07-13T02:24:00.001-04:00

4. （插曲）Contra / 魂斗罗

就在现在这个时候大家都在说山寨，外国网站都在说中国的KIRF(Keepin’ It Real Fake)，而事实是，其实远在我们小时候，小霸王就已经把这股风潮推上了高峰。成龙的“望子成龙小霸王”让多少人享受到了童年的乐趣。

而我现在觉得也许在那个时候我喜欢的音乐就开始变了方向……

5. 现在时间凌晨五点三十五分

四年级的时候很偶然听到周华健和风雨无阻那盒磁带，谁知道我竟然几乎听了他六年。还记得那个时候看到盗版的磁带心情很复杂。一面希望盗版少一点，能买到正版；一面又觉得盗版少是人气不够的表现。而那个时候周华健很不幸的符合了后面那种情况。

不过我对磁带最后的这段最有印象。神奇的是，现在听到这一段竟然还是能几乎一模一样的背出来……

而大概就在那个时候，我开始学英语了。还记得教材叫做“马泽的故事“，甚至还记得当中的一首歌：

“We are Bob and Muzzy. Muzzy and Bob are we. Me and you, we are two, two great friends are we. “

不过更神奇的是，我现在竟然找到了这首歌，从3:23开始听：

6. 七子之歌

1997-1999的这三年是神奇的三年，我从六年级一下到了初中。97年的时候还是很懵懂的看着老江在电视上流眼泪，然后好像全班全校都在哭。不知道为什么，那个时候我拼命想挤眼泪出来，但是眼睛不听我的。但是那年我记住了“一九九二年～又是一个春天~”那首歌，后来我又记住了“来吧来吧，相约九八”，一直到后一年的七子之歌。其实我记住的是容韵林和她的声音还有她的普通话，那个时候觉得她很漂亮。

而另一个让我记住那几年，特别是1998年的东西，还是赵本山和“昨天，今天，明天”，“九八九八不得了，洪水大丰收，粮食被赶跑……”。从小到大不知道记住了多少相声小品，但是说实话，赵本山真的是娱乐了一代人。不管人们说他恶俗也好，说他拖了相声发展的后退也好，至少我庆幸在那个娱乐不多的年代里，每年的春节都有他。

只是我没有想到，好像就在昨天的“往前迈两步忘了”，已经十年过去了……

(つづく……)

Z’s Trilogy / My Very Own Musical Opera (Origin, Episode 1)

2009-07-10T00:40:00.001-04:00

1. “我要找我爸爸”-咪咪流浪记

小时候的回忆很多，不知道是从哪里开始的，也不知道是在哪里结束的。而几乎所有的歌都是和电视、动画片相关的，包括“舒克舒克舒克舒克舒克舒克舒克舒克，……”“就不告诉你就不告诉你，就不～告～诉～你！”但是不知道为什么，我对这首歌记忆特别深，甚至完全不记得电视讲的是什么。很多年以后我还会突然哼起这首歌。

不过这也让我想起了小时候爸爸总是工作，似乎每天都是很晚很晚睡觉。当然，小时候都是八点以前就睡了，不像现在，反过来换老爸觉得我睡的太晚了。那时候妈妈一直抱怨，从来没有全家一起看过电视。而我也从小喜欢和妈妈在一起，除了爸爸扎人的胡子茬，还因为和他在一起的时间实在是不多。只是有时候会突然回忆起一家人躺在床上玩传话的游戏，记得好像玩得很开心……

2. Transformers

变形金刚好像是另一半童年的开始。当然，这首不是电视剧的歌。

表哥有一些电视的磁带，有时候会借回来听。老妈后来跟我形容，说我能把磁带里的内容一模一样的说一遍，连声调都一样。现在连自己都觉得神奇。

3. 灌篮高手

印象里好像是三年级，偶然看到这个动画片。似乎所有的男生都是因为灌篮高手而喜欢篮球。那时候的我甚至不知道乔丹穿的几号，不知道起跳是违例（谁让仙道总是做一些很假的假动作）。一直到96年（似乎是），看到中央台转播的公牛和超音速的决赛，才算是篮球真正入门了。那次也是第一次看到久仰大名的乔丹打球。本来已经准备转台了，突然听到解说讲到了乔丹的名字，把我拉了回去。看来我也是能记住细节的

不过灌篮高手也是第一次让我认识到了日本动画片的冗长，比如相田那个20秒的三分放了整整一集，也就是20多分钟……

(つづく……)

MoMA – 4th of July

2009-07-04T21:03:00.003-04:00

Please see the sidebar to the right.

Cap Ou Pas Cap

2009-07-04T00:39:00.001-04:00

“那么，大学？”早上醒来发现自己躺在寝室的高低铺上，易成不禁疑惑自己在哪里。从小到大没有睡过这玩意儿，也没有过离家这么远上学住校的经历，不禁新鲜，又暗中发怯。这也难怪，从今天起这张离家十分之一个长征的床就是自己安身立命的地方，确切的说是从昨天晚上开始。四年，谁知道会发生什么。

和几乎所有的同龄人一样，易成也是独子，或者说是单传，取名字也是费了一翻周折。关于这个成，江湖上流传了很多说法，但是易成自己觉得没那么多故事，名字其实一目了然，无非是父母希望自己容易成才而已。长大以后，他终于证实了自己的想法，或者说部分证实。他的名字的确没有那么多故事，“哪有你想的那么复杂，”老爸说，“成，不过是个辈份而已，家谱上排的。”易成对老爸的回答一阵郁闷，发展到竟对自己的名字产生了排斥。后来他才知道，原来当时的那种感觉可以用晕来形容。更后来他又得知，竟然有个打球的也姓易。易成念大学的时候坊间到处流传他在体育大学如果牛叉，出人意料的是待到易成毕业，这家伙竟然还念大一……

当然，这是后话。

不过名字归名字。所有人的名字都包含了一种美好的愿望，但是毕竟还是愿望，要都能实现就不会叫做愿望了。易成也难免落俗。高考就是个例子，高不成低不就的分数。这么说可别以为是北大和哈工大的区别，其实是在第二批和第三批之间游走。不过这样的分数也有好处，就是意味着轻松。高三的时候老师们流行的说法就是苦完了高中大学就轻松了。当时说得易成口水一流一个西湖的。这不，躺在这张小小硬板床的第一天，他就开始计划全面阐述轻松了。当然，在他第一个寒假收到两门不及格的成绩单时，他还是意识到，轻松也是要有代价的。这样的经历也让他明白了一个道理，人们都是会为了满足自己的利益而不惜威胁到别人的利益，即使是无比高尚的老师。

不过，这当然也是后话。

说完这些后话，其实也不妨再加一些，就在易成躺在床上畅想四年会发生什么的时候，如果他真能得到机器猫的帮助，他会知道，其实四年什么也没发生。高中的时候设想参加四届乐队大赛——ZERO；高中的时候幻想奔波于美女之间，炙手可热——NULL；高中的时候自信成绩拔尖年年奖学金——N/A。所以，有的时候能知道结果并不是什么好事，至少对于易成来说。如果一个坐板凳的在还没开赛之前就知道在结束时候的数据统计里，他的名字边上会写：“Did Not Play – Coach’s Decision” 他会有什么感觉呢。当然，这样的比喻其实也是有例外的，例外就是老穆了。

写到这里你也知道了，这些又是后话，后话的后话。

(Might be continued…)

The end? Tell me where is it?

2009-07-01T00:46:00.002-04:00

When you stand on Brooklyn Bridge, looking at the traffic beneath, you can’t help but wonder: the traffic, it never, ever stops, and where does it head to?; the cars, one after one, which one will you pay attention to? They just passed you by, and not even in your memory, and you’ll never see them again.

But the point is, the traffic, it never stops; this city, this world, all the people around you, they never stop. I get tired even when thinking about it. Will they feel the same? Maybe not. But I do. And I feel sorry for myself when I do.

If you look back and had the power to adjust your life, you’d be the wisest person that has ever existed. You’d know that if you had done such and such, you’d be totally different from what you are now. But the question remains, how would you want yourself to be different? To be a millionaire, or billionaire? Or not to let your first love go away from you? Or not leaving your family behind for your stupid fantasy? Have you ever stopped and think about such questions? If you do, do you have an answer for it by now?

I mean, if you feel your life has already been laid out for you, have you ever taken a pause and ask why? Whereas if you don’t feel that way, have you done the same thing to think how you want it to be?

Sometimes, you just need to take a pee and bring yourself back together…

The noise from the cars is still pounding my eardrums, even when I’ve already walked away…

Just as Nineteen Hundred would put it: “… I WAS getting off, guaranteed, not wasn't a problem. It wasn’t what I saw that stopped me, Max, it was what I didn’t see, you understand that? What I didn’t see. In all that sprawling city there was everything except an end. There was no end. What I did not see was the whole thing came to an end, the end of the world. …”

Tidal Waves

2009-06-30T02:25:00.003-04:00

Just can’t seem to find a blog hosting website that’s not blocked, BY THE DAMN GFW!!! I don’t know why I don’t want to go for Blogbus or stuff, I just don’t. And at the same time, those PC makers seem to start giving in, at least Sony has begun to ship out Laptops with that stupid “Green DAMN” thing, without guaranteeing the “authenticity, legality or compatibility of the software”. Sounds lame, huh? Sometimes the stupidity of this government can really frustrate you, like this software, the GFW, all the things. They use porno as an excuse, an excuse for themselves, for that everybody else knows the real intention behind this. What’s the point? What’s the darn point?

Yao. The foot. The left foot. When I look through the comments, it was like Michael Jackson. He’s not dead yet dude! I know he’s never a good defender, rebounder, athlete, but he’s decent and solid. And now I understand, as I look back and connect the dots, that why there was rumors about Houston trying to trade to get Amar’e. It was all ridiculous back then, but not any more now. After all, he does not deserve this.

At least the song is right, for this part, tidal waves only crash on the way.

Behind the wall

2009-06-28T20:27:00.001-04:00

我猜这段也没几个人会看到，这该死的GFW什么时候才能安息，不然我也只能在这墙后面躲躲。其实我也是没什么可写的，一片空白，除了特想回国

今天突然想起来阵雨说过的一句话，“如果生活是一杯酒，那么我干杯你随意”。我到现在还不知道是什么意思，就觉得说起来挺有气势，挺拽的，如果配根烟就更绝了

不过也总是有点道理，想想我现在就没有干杯，倒是大家都干了，就留我呢

前两天闷着，闷着看了奋斗了，或者粪豆儿，那里面那谁，高高瘦瘦的样子，讲话做事的样子，想起一人来。原来高中的时候总觉得怎么这么不顺，总爱装出一副苦大仇深故事多的样子来，但是后来才明白，我那点破事儿算个啥呀，大学那四年，也许平静，但是绝对够味儿了

做人就不能想太多，杯里的喝完了再说吧，不喝别人可都盯着你那个杯子呢

Air France and Final Destination

2009-06-13T12:42:00.001-04:00

不知道这里封完了没有。

新闻有点晚了，前两天看到当时没赶上法航没死的一个人过了两天车祸里死了，我马上想到那个时候和阵雨一起看的死神来了，几乎就是一模一样的情节。似乎没赶上的不止他一个，剩下的那几个我猜应该是活的心惊胆战吧？

WSJ: China to Add Web-Censoring Software to PCs

2009-06-08T00:19:00.001-04:00

By Mark Lee and Tim Culpan

June 8 (Bloomberg) -- China plans to require all personal computers sold in the country as of July 1 to include software that prevents access to an automatically updated list of Web sites banned by the government, the Wall Street Journal reported.

The plan is aimed at preventing "harmful" information from influencing young people, according to an unpublicized Ministry of Industry and Information Technology document dated May 19, the Journal reported today. PC makers have been told of the requirement, part of a government program called “Green Dam- Youth Escort,” the newspaper said.

China, the world’s biggest Internet market by users, already blocks Web sites for organizations such as Amnesty International whose content it deems unacceptable. The Asian country ranks No. 1 for online censorship, according to Herdict.org, which compiles reports of Web outages.

PCs in China must ship with software made by Jinhui Computer System Engineering Co. and Beijing Dazheng Human Language Technology Academy Co., both of which have military and security ministry ties, the Journal said. The software is mainly targeted at pornography, the report cited Bryan Zhang, Jinhui’s founder, as saying.

Wang Lijian, spokesman for the ministry, said he couldn’t immediately comment when contacted by Bloomberg News.

China has told PC makers to offer software that blocks some Web sites, Liana Teo, a Singapore-based spokeswoman for Hewlett- Packard Co., the world’s biggest PC maker, told Bloomberg News by phone.

Pre-Install or CD

Makers have the option of installing the software on computers before shipping, or including it on a compact disc, according to Teo.

Lenovo Group Ltd. spokesman Reid Walker, and Dell Inc. spokeswoman Faith Brewitt, couldn’t immediately comment on the Journal report when contacted by Bloomberg News.

Amnesty International is among 165 Internet sites rendered inaccessible in the past week, according to Herdict.org, a project of Harvard University’s Berkman Center for Internet and Society.

To contact the reporter on this story: Mark Lee in Hong Kong at wlee37@bloomberg.net; Tim Culpan in Taipei at tculpan1@bloomberg.net.

Last Updated: June 7, 2009 22:18 EDT

为了忘却的记念 -- 鲁迅

2009-06-03T21:10:00.003-04:00

一

我早已想写一点文字，来记念几个青年的作家。这并非为了别的，只因为两年以来，悲愤总时时来袭击我的心，至今没有停止，我很想借此算是竦身一摇，将悲哀摆脱，给自己轻松一下，照直说，就是我倒要将他们忘却了。

两年前的此时，即一九三一年的二月七日夜或八日晨，是我们的五个青年作家同时遇害的时候。当时上海的报章都不敢载这件事，或者也许是不愿，或不屑载这件事，只在《文艺新闻》上有一点隐约其辞的文章。那第十一期（五月二十五日）里，有一篇林莽先生作的《白莽印象记》，中间说：

“他做了好些诗，又译过匈牙利诗人彼得斐的几首诗，当时的《奔流》的编辑者鲁迅接到了他

的投稿，便来信要和他会面，但他却是不愿见名人的人，结果是鲁迅自己跑来找他，竭力鼓励他作文

学的工作，但他终于不能坐在亭子间里写，又去跑他的路了。不久，他又一次的被了捕。……”

这里所说的我们的事情其实是不确的。白莽并没有这么高慢，他曾经到过我的寓所来，但也不是因为我要求和他会面；我也没有这么高慢，对于一位素不相识的投稿者，会轻率的写信去叫他。我们相见的原因很平常，那时他所投的是从德文译出的《彼得斐传》，我就发信去讨原文，原文是载在诗集前面的，邮寄不便，他就亲自送来了。看去是一个二十多岁的青年，面貌很端正，颜色是黑黑的，当时的谈话我已经忘却，只记得他自说姓徐，象山人；我问他为什么代你收信的女士是这么一个怪名字（怎么怪法，现在也忘却了），他说她就喜欢起得这么怪，罗曼谛克，自己也有些和她不大对劲了。就只剩了这一点。

夜里，我将译文和原文粗粗的对了一遍，知道除几处误译之外，还有一个故意的曲译。他像是不喜欢“国民诗人”这个字的，都改成“民众诗人”了。第二天又接到他一封来信，说很悔和我相见，他的话多，我的话少，又冷，好像受了一种威压似的。我便写一封回信去解释，说初次相会，说话不多，也是人之常情，并且告诉他不应该由自己的爱憎，将原文改变。因为他的原书留在我这里了，就将我所藏的两本集子送给他，问他可能再译几首诗，以供读者的参看。他果然译了几首，自己拿来了，我们就谈得比第一回多一些。这传和诗，后来就都登在《奔流》第二卷第五本，即最末的一本里。

我们第三次相见，我记得是在一个热天。有人打门了，我去开门时，来的就是白莽，却穿着一件厚棉袍，汗流满面，彼此都不禁失笑。这时他才告诉我他是一个革命者，刚由被捕而释出，衣服和书籍全被没收了，连我送他的那两本；身上的袍子是从朋友那里借来的，没有夹衫，而必须穿长衣，所以只好这么出汗。我想，这大约就是林莽先生说的“又一次的被了捕”的那一次了。

我很欣幸他的得释，就赶紧付给稿费，使他可以买一件夹衫，但一面又很为我的那两本书痛惜：落在捕房的手里，真是明珠投暗了。那两本书，原是极平常的，一本散文，一本诗集，据德文译者说，这是他搜集起来的，虽在匈牙利本国，也还没有这么完全的本子，然而印在《莱克朗氏万有文库》（Reclam's Universal-Bibliothek）中，倘在德国，就随处可得，也值不到一元钱。不过在我是一种宝贝，因为这是三十年前，正当我热爱彼得斐的时候，特地托丸善书店从德国去买来的，那时还恐怕因为书极便宜，店员不肯经手，开口时非常惴惴。后来大抵带在身边，只是情随事迁，已没有翻译的意思了，这回便决计送给这也如我的那时一样，热爱彼得斐的诗的青年，算是给它寻得了一个好着落。所以还郑重其事，托柔石亲自送去的。谁料竟会落在“三道头”之类的手里的呢，这岂不冤枉！

二

我的决不邀投稿者相见，其实也并不完全因为谦虚，其中含着省事的分子也不少。由于历来的经验，我知道青年们，尤其是文学青年们，十之九是感觉很敏，自尊心也很旺盛的，一不小心，极容易得到误解，所以倒是故意回避的时候多。见面尚且怕，更不必说敢有托付了。但那时我在上海，也有一个惟一的不但敢于随便谈笑，而且还敢于托他办点私事的人，那就是送书去给白莽的柔石。

我和柔石最初的相见，不知道是何时，在那里。他仿佛说过，曾在北京听过我的讲义，那么，当在八九年之前了。我也忘记了在上海怎么来往起来，总之，他那时住在景云里，离我的寓所不过四五家门面，不知怎么一来，就来往起来了。大约最初的一回他就告诉我是姓赵，名平复。但他又曾谈起他家乡的豪绅的气焰之盛，说是有一个绅士，以为他的名字好，要给儿子用，叫他不要用这名字了。所以我疑心他的原名是“平福”，平稳而有福，才正中乡绅的意，对于“复”字却未必有这么热心。他的家乡，是台州的宁海，这只要一看他那台州式的硬气就知道，而且颇有点迂，有时会令我忽而想到方孝孺，觉得好像也有些这模样的。

他躲在寓里弄文学，也创作，也翻译，我们往来了许多日，说得投合起来了，于是另外约定了几个同意的青年，设立朝华社。目的是在绍介东欧和北欧的文学，输入外国的版画，因为我们都以为应该来扶植一点刚健质朴的文艺。接着就印《朝花旬刊》，印《近代世界短篇小说集》，印《艺苑朝华》，算都在循着这条线，只有其中的一本《蕗谷虹儿画选》，是为了扫荡上海滩上的“艺术家”，即戳穿叶灵凤这纸老虎而印的。

然而柔石自己没有钱，他借了二百多块钱来做印本。除买纸之外，大部分的稿子和杂务都是归他做，如跑印刷局，制图，校字之类。可是往往不如意，说起来皱着眉头。看他旧作品，都很有悲观的气息，但实际上并不然，他相信人们是好的。我有时谈到人会怎样的骗人，怎样的卖友，怎样的吮血，他就前额亮晶晶的，惊疑地圆睁了近视的眼睛，抗议道，“会这样的么？―― 不至于此罢？……”

不过朝花社不久就倒闭了，我也不想说清其中的原因，总之是柔石的理想的头，先碰了一个大钉子，力气固然白化，此外还得去借一百块钱来付纸账。后来他对于我那“人心惟危”说的怀疑减少了，有时也叹息道，“真会这样的么？……”但是，他仍然相信人们是好的。

他于是一面将自己所应得的朝花社的残书送到明日书店和光华书局去，希望还能够收回几文钱，一面就拚命的译书，准备还借款，这就是卖给商务印书馆的《丹麦短篇小说集》和戈理基作的长篇小说《阿尔泰莫诺夫之事业》。但我想，这些译稿，也许去年已被兵火烧掉了。

他的迂渐渐的改变起来，终于也敢和女性的同乡或朋友一同去走路了，但那距离，却至少总有三四尺的。这方法很不好，有时我在路上遇见他，只要在相距三四尺前后或左右有一个年青漂亮的女人，我便会疑心就是他的朋友。但他和我一同走路的时候，可就走得近了，简直是扶住我，因为怕我被汽车或电车撞死；我这面也为他近视而又要照顾别人担心，大家都苍皇失措的愁一路，所以倘不是万不得已，我是不大和他一同出去的，我实在看得他吃力，因而自己也吃力。

无论从旧道德，从新道德，只要是损己利人的，他就挑选上，自己背起来。

他终于决定地改变了，有一回，曾经明白的告诉我，此后应该转换作品的内容和形式。我说：这怕难罢，譬如使惯了刀的，这回要他耍棍，怎么能行呢？他简洁的答道：只要学起来！

他说的并不是空话，真也在从新学起来了，其时他曾经带了一个朋友来访我，那就是冯铿女士。谈了一些天，我对于她终于很隔膜，我疑心她有点罗曼谛克，急于事功；我又疑心柔石的近来要做大部的小说，是发源于她的主张的。但我又疑心我自己，也许是柔石的先前的斩钉截铁的回答，正中了我那其实是偷懒的主张的伤疤，所以不自觉地迁怒到她身上去了。――我其实也并不比我所怕见的神经过敏而自尊的文学青年高明。

她的体质是弱的，也并不美丽。

三

直到左翼作家联盟成立之后，我才知道我所认识的白莽，就是在《拓荒者》上做诗的殷夫。有一次大会时，我便带了一本德译的，一个美国的新闻记者所做的中国游记去送他，这不过以为他可以由此练习德文，另外并无深意。然而他没有来。我只得又托了柔石。

但不久，他们竟一同被捕，我的那一本书，又被没收，落在“三道头”之类的手里了。

四

明日书店要出一种期刊，请柔石去做编辑，他答应了；书店还想印我的译著，托他来问版税的办法，我便将我和北新书局所订的合同，抄了一份交给他，他向衣袋里一塞，匆匆的走了。其时是一九三一年一月十六日的夜间，而不料这一去，竟就是我和他相见的末一回，竟就是我们的永诀。

第二天，他就在一个会场上被捕了，衣袋里还藏着我那印书的合同，听说官厅因此正在找寻我。印书的合同，是明明白白的，但我不愿意到那些不明不白的地方去辩解。记得《说岳全传》里讲过一个高僧，当追捕的差役刚到寺门之前，他就“坐化”了，还留下什么“何立从东来，我向西方走”的偈子。这是奴隶所幻想的脱离苦海的惟一的好方法，“剑侠”盼不到，最自在的惟此而已。我不是高僧，没有涅槃的自由，却还有生之留恋，我于是就逃走。

这一夜，我烧掉了朋友们的旧信札，就和女人抱着孩子走在一个客栈里。不几天，即听得外面纷纷传我被捕，或是被杀了，柔石的消息却很少。有的说，他曾经被巡捕带到明日书店里，问是否是编辑；有的说，他曾经被巡捕带往北新书局去，问是否是柔石，手上上了铐，可见案情是重的。但怎样的案情，却谁也不明白。

他在囚系中，我见过两次他写给同乡的信，第一回是这样的――

“我与三十五位同犯（七个女的）于昨日到龙华。并于昨夜上了镣，开政治犯从未上镣之纪录。此

案累及太大，我一时恐难出狱，书店事望兄为我代办之。现亦好，且跟殷夫兄学德文，此事可告周先

生；望周先生勿念，我等未受刑。捕房和公安局，几次问周先生地址，但我那里知道。诸望勿念。祝

好！

赵少雄一月二十四日。”

以上正面。

“洋铁饭碗，要二三只

如不能见面，可将东西

望转交赵少雄”

以上背面。

他的心情并未改变，想学德文，更加努力；也仍在记念我，像在马路上行走时候一般。但他信里有些话是错误的，政治犯而上镣，并非从他们开始，但他向来看得官场还太高，以为文明至今，到他们才开始了严酷。其实是不然的。果然，第二封信就很不同，措词非常惨苦，且说冯女士的面目都浮肿了，可惜我没有抄下这封信。其时传说也更加纷繁，说他可以赎出的也有，说他已经解往南京的也有，毫无确信；而用函电来探问我的消息的也多起来，连母亲在北京也急得生病了，我只得一一发信去更正，这样的大约有二十天。

天气愈冷了，我不知道柔石在那里有被褥不？我们是有的。洋铁碗可曾收到了没有？……但忽然得到一个可靠的消息，说柔石和其他二十三人，已于二月七日夜或八日晨，在龙华警备司令部被枪毙了，他的身上中了十弹。

原来如此！……

在一个深夜里，我站在客栈的院子中，周围是堆着的破烂的什物；人们都睡觉了，连我的女人和孩子。我沉重的感到我失掉了很好的朋友，中国失掉了很好的青年，我在悲愤中沉静下去了，然而积习却从沉静中抬起头来，凑成了这样的几句：

惯于长夜过春时，挈妇将雏鬓有丝。

梦里依稀慈母泪，城头变幻大王旗。

忍看朋辈成新鬼，怒向刀丛觅小诗。

吟罢低眉无写处，月光如水照缁衣。

但末二句，后来不确了，我终于将这写给了一个日本的歌人。

可是在中国，那时是确无写处的，禁锢得比罐头还严密。我记得柔石在年底曾回故乡，住了好些时，到上海后很受朋友的责备。他悲愤的对我说，他的母亲双眼已经失明了，要他多住几天，他怎么能够就走呢？我知道这失明的母亲的眷眷的心，柔石的拳拳的心。当《北斗》创刊时，我就想写一点关于柔石的文章，然而不能够，只得选了一幅珂勒惠支（Kathe Kollwitz）夫人的木刻 , 名曰《牺牲》，是一个母亲悲哀地献出她的儿子去的，算是只有我一个人心里知道的柔石的记念。

同时被难的四个青年文学家之中，李伟森我没有会见过，胡也频在上海也只见过一次面，谈了几句天。较熟的要算白莽，即殷夫了，他曾经和我通过信，投过稿，但现在寻起来，一无所得，想必是十七那夜统统烧掉了，那时我还没有知道被捕的也有白莽。然而那本《彼得斐诗集》却在的，翻了一遍，也没有什么，只在一首《 Wahlspruch 》（格言）的旁边，有钢笔写的四行译文道：

“生命诚宝贵，

爱情价更高；

若为自由故，

二者皆可抛！”

又在第二叶上，写着“徐培根” 三个字，我疑心这是他的真姓名。

五

前年的今日，我避在客栈里，他们却是走向刑场了；去年的今日，我在炮声中逃在英租界，他们则早已埋在不知那里的地下了；今年的今日，我才坐在旧寓里，人们都睡觉了，连我的女人和孩子。我又沉重的感到我失掉了很好的朋友，中国失掉了很好的青年，我在悲愤中沉静下去了，不料积习又从沉静中抬起头来，写下了以上那些字。

要写下去，在中国的现在，还是没有写处的。年青时读向子期《思旧赋》，很怪他为什么只有寥寥的几行，刚开头却又煞了尾。然而，现在我懂得了。

不是年青的为年老的写记念，而在这三十年中，却使我目睹许多青年的血，层层淤积起来，将我埋得不能呼吸，我只能用这样的笔墨，写几句文章，算是从泥土中挖一个小孔，自己延口残喘，这是怎样的世

界呢。夜正长，路也正长，我不如忘却，不说的好罢。但我知道，即使不是我，将来总会有记起他们，再说他们的时候的。……

二月七――八日。

Status update compilation

2009-06-02T12:27:00.000-04:00

Maybe it's time to write something, haven't done that in quite some while.

I know probably few people would see this post, at this "sensitive" time. Youtube, Blogger, Twitter, seems like everything from outside the country has been blocked. I mean, sometimes I do understand your point, and sometimes I even do support some of your decisions, but as far as Internet censorship goes, I don't agree, not even a bit, with you. Which year do you think it is? People really want to make some fuss out of the Internet, they can do it anyway. What you are doing is simply ripped the basic rights of off the people who are Internet users, plain and simple users. You have made their lives miserable.

Maybe I shouldn't continue. Hope things get back to normal after this anniversary thing.

The second thing I know is that Magic has got problems. Our mighty Sir Charles has just spoken, "Magic in 7". And what do we know about him? Big ass? Not only that. He never gets it right in terms of prediction, NEVER and EVER!

One more thing comes into my mind right now is the movie "When Nietzsche Wept", in which a line goes by, "Not to take possession of your aims in your life is like letting your life be an accident". Thoughtful isn't it? Even more thoughtful if you think it twice, three times, and say it loud in your mind.

Next, as far as "networking" goes, I hate that. I can't talk. I can write, I can sing, I can joke, and I can talk with friends, but I can't talk with people I don't want to talk to and people I don't really know. I BS all the time with my jokes and people may never understand my jokes. But it's alright, there will be someone that can understand, as well as my tastes, tastes for lots of things, music, movies, and stuff.

See, in some sense, I have never grown up. I don't how to talk to people, and just sitting in the corner of the room drunk, looking, and quiet. But something I don't understand is that I don't like to abbreviate that much, I don't like to use "u" instead of "you", to use "2nite" instead of "tonight", and I don't like to use Internet language, "lol" and some stuff in Chinese, and I don't like to swear. I'm just like every old man.

The last thing is, Jason Becker is great! I never knew, and I should have known a lot lot earlier. I remember Kraze talked about him before. But he is great, doesn't matter how much time has passed.

Okay, finally, Happy That Stupid "Er Tong Jie", YOU KIDS! Oops... it's over already?

Center of Milky Way

2009-05-29T23:03:00.001-04:00

Cavs sign ownership deal with China group

2009-05-26T00:04:00.004-04:00

ORLANDO, Fla. (AP) -- The Cleveland Cavaliers have signed an agreement with an investment group from China to become minority owners of the NBA franchise and its arena, a partnership that could impact superstar LeBron James' future with the team.
The Asian conglomerate, which includes JianHua Huang, a Chinese businessman who has brokered sponsorship deals with the New York Yankees and other sports franchises in the U.S., could acquire up to 15 percent of Cavaliers Operating Company, the entity that owns the team and operates Quicken Loans Arena.
The deal, completed by the sides in recent days, must be approved by the league's board of governors.
Team president Len Komoroski said Sunday the group approached Cavs principal owner Dan Gilbert about the partnership and called the business venture "an exciting new opportunity."
Gilbert's role in overseeing the organization and 20,000-seat arena will not be affected by the new partners.
Citing multiple unnamed sources, the Cleveland Plain Dealer first reported the sides had a tentative deal in place. But in recent days, paperwork was completed between Gilbert and the consortium. It will now be sent to the league office for approval.
Huang and others in the group attended Games 1 and 2 of the Eastern Conference finals in Cleveland. On Friday, they sat courtside and watched James hit a game-winning 3-pointer in the final second to give the Cavaliers a 96-95 win and even the best-of-seven series which resumed Sunday night.
If approved, the deal would provide marketing opportunities for the Cavaliers and James, who is eligible to become a free agent in the summer of 2010. The 24-year-old MVP, who is already among the league's most popular players in Asia, has stated he wants to become the first billionaire athlete. His brand overseas could be enhanced by playing for a team with Chinese business partners.
There has been ongoing speculation that James will leave Cleveland to play in a larger market like New York or Los Angeles because of the vast business opportunities. But James -- and his corporate sponsors like Nike -- have broader goals and may be able to attain them by tapping into China's colossal consumer marketplace without him ever leaving Cleveland.
James has never given any indication he wants to leave the Cavaliers, who drafted the Akron, Ohio, native with the No. 1 overall pick in 2003. He won a gold medal with the U.S. team last summer at the Beijing Games and has made four trips to China, including one with the Cavs during the preseason two years ago.
Gilbert has been approached by outside investors in the past, but his original business group has mostly remained intact since he bought the Cavaliers and the rights to operate their arena for $375 million from former majority owner Gordon Gund in 2004.
Gilbert purchased the team with several other investors, including longtime business partner David Katzman, R&B superstar Usher and others. Gund maintained partial ownership.
However, in the past two years, Katzman has decided to focus on other business interests and the Chinese group would essentially take over his percentage of the Cavs.

Human Interface

2009-05-22T18:43:00.001-04:00

It’s brilliant!

Think I Saw

2009-05-20T23:16:00.001-04:00

Think I saw Time the other day, in the crowded street, running back and forth in the traffic, waving arms and making that faces towards people and cars trying to catch their attention. But no one did. But he was making his signals so strong that I could not really ignore his presence. For a moment, it seemed like he was the only one in the street, the only one moving. But still, no one noticed him. I started to wonder, had he been here for a while, I mean, like, every single day? If he had, why had I not seen him before? He would not be around forever. That is for sure, as I can see from his eyes and his face. He was desperate to make people notice him. No one.

Think I saw Memory the other night, right over there across the street, under the neon lights, blurring, undistinguishable from afar, as if she was trying to hide, hide from people, from this world, and from me. Had I not seen her before, I would be sure that I would not recognize her. In fact, I did not. Did not realize that it was her till I passed her by. When I realized and turned my head and looked back, to my surprise, she had already broken into tiny little jigsaw pieces, millions of them, and giving out those voices as if she was smiling and saying something to me. But I just seemed unable to put all the pieces back together again. Never again.

Think I saw saw myself somewhere, somewhere I used to be before, but I could not remember now. Think I saw him talking, walking, with someone, maybe, not really sure. Seemed happy though, that I was sure. I did not know if I should walk over to myself and say something. I was just standing there, looking at myself, lingering, then, I woke up.

But just when I tried to get out of the bed, I saw devil hovering over my head. I was angry, and shouted, “What da hell are you doing here?!” He looked at me, seemed surprised, “Take a look at where you are, this is my world! Goddammit! Now get da hell out of my Hell!!!”

5.19.200X

2009-05-17T12:20:00.001-04:00

I know, I know it’s not 19th yet, but it’s about to be, in just 2 days.

Sometimes you’ll be amazed by how fast time goes when you look back, back at things that you would somehow remember a little bit.

Should’ve been studying since long time ago, but I’ve been messing around, just like “someone” staying at home everyday and doing only-God-and-herself-know-what-she-is-doing.

But anyway, what’s been cracking? Heard Blogger is blocked again. What does that shit mean? And “I hope you can’t sleep and you dream about it; And when you dream I hope you can’t sleep and you scream about it”.

Actually I just wanted to have a new song, and ended up with writing some shit up here. Never mind people, never mind. This is a song I heard from Kraze, and never really paid attention listening to it. But it’s a beautiful one.

Four, Six, and the rest

2009-05-15T23:46:00.001-04:00

You know who will be the next “black” president of the United States? This guy right up here, Shane Battier. If he ever is seen as “black”.

Kenny “the Jet” Smith says it every time, “The only way Rockets can play well is to play hard.”

Charles “Chuck” Barkley said after Four, “Coach Adelman, I don’t know what the hell are you doing, but congratulations, keep doing it!”

L.A. Times says of Luis Scola, “This is guy (Scola) is a Hall of Famer if he gets to play against Pau Gasol more often.”

Cap ou pas cap?

2009-05-14T00:28:00.001-04:00

I was looking for the meaning:

cap is a (children) abbreviation of capable
cap ou pas cap? = capable ou pas capable? are you able or not ? do you have the courage to do it?

So, you dare? How about, say, not seeing each other for the next 10 years. That’ll be fun, isn’t it?

That was a little re-flash of the movie, as it just flew through my mind for a second, and I have no ab-f-ing-solutely no idea why I wrote all these things.

It’s joke. It has got to be, a joke, just like all those jokes that happened in those upper-east high-end bars with those high-end women.

So, um… cap ou pas cap?

妈妈天

2009-05-10T01:57:00.001-04:00

今天（明天）是妈妈天。我小时候知道有世上只有妈妈好那个歌，但是我大了才知道那原来是电视里面的歌，我怎么不记得看过那个电视？还一直以为是民俗歌曲。小时候我知道大人都会问你，或者是调戏你，爸爸好还是妈妈好啊，如果你说妈妈好，妈妈就很开心了，如果你说都好，他们就会说，这个小孩真懂事，如果你说爸爸好。。。我不确定有多少小孩会说爸爸好，至少我觉得不多

小时候真的觉得妈妈好，爸爸凶，有胡子，不要亲爸爸，妈妈说我就是这样。妈妈胖，软软的，笑起来没眼睛，会帮我吃我吃不下的饭，会当我的热水袋。爸爸只会叫我做作业，写毛笔字，不要看动画片

其实我那时候应该多吃饭，多写毛笔字的

小时候没妈妈天这个东西，街道上市面上流传的说法是，你过生日的时候其实应该给妈妈过，那天是妈妈最痛苦的一天。小时候很不以为然。现在有了妈妈天，大概就很少有人这么说了吧

我发现自己记性不好，小时候的事情记不住，第一次听说年份这回事情是1990年，在一个弄堂里跟妈妈走路的时候听到的。说起小龙人，草皮会记住翠翠婆婆，阵雨会想到大老龟，我就只会想到小龙人，和就不告诉你就不告诉你就不～告～诉～你！恩，我对声音比较记的住

反正就是妈妈天，每年都有，下次我弄个儿子天

我知道我知道再过个几天就是爸爸天了，爸爸天再说吧

顺便都问候一下各位的母亲吧，你妈好吗？

Maybe I Can Care Less

2009-05-09T03:46:00.001-04:00

Ron Artest说:“I think I'm the best. I know I'm not. But I think I am.” 其实我也这么想的，只是从来没有像他这么总结过。

身边的许多藕断丝连的事情其实我可以少关心一些，比如球赛，比如遥远的某些人物。

爸妈说，你抓紧啊，好的都被人挑走了。我想想，我的确错过了许多人，有时候很微小的一个选择就能改变命运，何况是大的，我不知道我选择对了没有，这种事情只有在retrospective的时候才能分辨对错。就比如我那个时候的那天晚上突然决定在QQ上加某个人，完全改变了我大学剩下那些日子的生活，甚至也许我也不用在这里隔着键盘屏幕才能交流了。

看阿超在twitter上说想结婚了，刚才有那么一瞬间觉得是挺好的，但是回头我又想到Rockstar那个电影了。也许我应该考虑一下了。我倒是像莴苣笋小朋友做的那个工作，做高压锅的，只是我这个锅子的减压阀老是漏气。

她说我长大了，我引用阿超的话“二十来岁的人了，开玩笑的啊？”不过其实我不想的，我还是老是突然想到小时候妈妈很晚带我去吃的第一个香草冰激淋，小时候六一放假的激动，小时候觉得时间怎么老是过的这么慢，小学似乎读了两百年，还有小时候难得一次第一个到教室，在学校门口吃的两串年糕一串里脊的早饭，和漂着芹菜味的有两颗贡丸的贡丸汤，还有初中为了一只小土狗哭的死去活来。

我觉得很慌，用洛江洪的话说是“不要慌”。我问你，如果是你发现自己大的一塌糊涂了，原来吃的很开心的依依的花菜一点都不觉得好吃了，原来花10块钱就能买到的满足现在怎么也买不来了，甚至想象力急剧下降了，没看着图片和画面连打飞机都想象不出来了，怎么办？

其实我还是剩了一点想象力的，比如我在想，如果崔西明年好了打控球，那火箭就是从1到4都一样高的了，会不会和金州差不多？

你看吧，想到还都是些没用的东西

也许，我是说也许，我就是想象力下降了

“Don't be too creative.” That's what I been telling myself recently. And it seems to be working for me…

换首歌听听，Who can sing me a memory? Just that I’m not really sure how it goes.

外面突然下很大的雨了

The No-Stats All-Star

2009-05-08T16:01:00.001-04:00

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/15/magazine/15Battier-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1

Take a look at this article and you’ll see how smart Shane Battier is.

Some excerpts:

…… Last season when the Rockets played the San Antonio Spurs Battier was assigned to guard their most dangerous scorer, Manu Ginóbili. Ginóbili comes off the bench, however, and his minutes are not in sync with the minutes of a starter like Battier. Battier privately went to Coach Rick Adelman and told him to bench him and bring him in when Ginóbili entered the game. “No one in the N.B.A. does that,” Morey says. “No one says put me on the bench so I can guard their best scorer all the time.” ……

…… People often say that Kobe Bryant has no weaknesses to his game, but that’s not really true. Before the game, Battier was given his special package of information. “He’s the only player we give it to,” Morey says. “We can give him this fire hose of data and let him sift. Most players are like golfers. You don’t want them swinging while they’re thinking.” …… Battier learns a lot from studying the data on the superstars he is usually assigned to guard. For instance, the numbers show him that Allen Iverson is one of the most efficient scorers in the N.B.A. when he goes to his right; when he goes to his left he kills his team. ……

…… Tonight Bryant complained that Battier was grabbing his jersey, Battier was pushing when no one was looking, Battier was committing crimes against humanity. Just before the half ended, Battier took a referee aside and said: “You and I both know Kobe does this all the time. I’m playing him honest. Don’t fall for his stuff.” Moments later, after failing to get a call, Bryant hurled the ball, screamed at the ref and was whistled for a technical foul. ……

…… (When picking college) Battier narrowed his choices to six schools — Kentucky, Kansas, North Carolina, Duke, Michigan and Michigan State — and told everyone else, politely, to leave him be. He then set out to minimize the degree to which the chosen schools could interfere with his studies; he had a 3.96 G.P.A. and was poised to claim Detroit Country Day School’s headmaster’s cup for best all-around student. He granted each head coach a weekly 15-minute window in which to phone him. These men happened to be among the most famous basketball coaches in the world and the most persistent recruiters, but Battier granted no exceptions. When the Kentucky coach Rick Pitino, who had just won a national championship, tried to call Battier outside his assigned time, Battier simply removed Kentucky from his list. “What 17-year-old has the stones to do that?” Wetzel asks. “To just cut off Rick Pitino because he calls outside his window?” Wetzel answers his own question: “It wasn’t like, ‘This is a really interesting 17-year-old.’ It was like, ‘This isn’t real.’ ”

Battier, even as a teenager, was as shrewd as he was disciplined. The minute he figured out where he was headed, he called a sensational high-school power forward in Peekskill, N.Y., named Elton Brand — and talked him into joining him at Duke. (Brand now plays for the Philadelphia 76ers.) “I thought he’d be the first black president,” Wetzel says. “He was Barack Obama before Barack Obama.”

…… The Rockets’ offense had broken down, and there was no usual place for Alston, still back near the half-court line, to go with the ball. The Lakers’ defense had also broken down; no player was where he was meant to be. The only person exactly where he should have been — wide open, standing at the most efficient spot on the floor from which to shoot — was Shane Battier. When Daryl Morey spoke of basketball intelligence, a phrase slipped out: “the I.Q. of where to be.” Fitting in on a basketball court, in the way Battier fits in, requires the I.Q. of where to be. Bang: Alston hit Battier with a long pass. Bang: Battier shot the 3, guiltlessly. Nothing but net. ……

那个甜甜圈是怎么回事？

2009-05-08T11:58:00.001-04:00

随便逛，看到有人在说甜甜圈，还说什么超级出名的，我纳闷了

“百滋百特”，是不是这么说的，那是什么东西。仔细一看，差点没喷出来，“Best Bite”, 哈哈，和Best Buy是什么关系？Axel Rose有没有在那里卖“American Tyranny” (Chinese Democracy)？

想起有个人写信问巴克利，你一天吃几个Doughnuts，他说我要数一数，早饭4个，中饭4个，晚饭4个，好像是12个。那个盒子里只够他吃早饭，难怪他每天这么有精神地喊：

“Southwest Airlines~ Flights o the night~~~ Yeah!!!”

Ron Artest Postgame

2009-05-07T13:28:00.001-04:00

Kenny said: “That’s the best response I’ve ever heard after a guy got ejected.”

RON ARTEST:

I put my arm on Kobe, to touch him when he was demanding the ball. He hits my arm down and I tell the ref, ‘Look he’s hitting my arm down, he can’t do that.’ You can touch a man until the ball (arrives) – it’s basic defense. Then he did it again. I told the refs, ‘You have to control this.’ Then he throws the elbow right at my neck. I told Kobe, ‘You can do whatever you want to do. I’m not rattled.’ I let the refs control it. What am I going to do out there? Continue to get hit?

Even in Game 1, he elbowed Shane. The league said he was just trying to get up, but he clearly was overaggressive on Shane. And my team, we’re not like that. We’re going to win fair and square or lose fair and square. We’re not going to fight or initiate anything. Kobe is great enough to take over games and lead his team. He could have done it without that."

I’m hoping the league looks at it and we’ll move on to Game 3

I knew I was going to get a technical foul. The point was to hopefully let the refs know I’m (upset) and tired of this guy elbowing me. I went over there, no punches, no shoves to the face, just confrontation. I backed off, and that’s a technical foul. I’ll take it. But I didn’t go there with the intention of getting ejected. I went there to tell Kobe he’s got to relax. He’s hitting the wrong person. You’re hitting Ron Artest (laughs). I mean, come on. I like to compete and I don’t back down from anyone. I just think it should be fair. It was clearly at my neck – his elbow was at my neck.

I’m not retaliating. I didn’t retaliate then. I did that already. I did that stuff when I was in high school and early in the NBA. I’m done with that. I’m just playing basketball. It’s been physical. We’re giving our best and will continue giving our best.

Game 2 and Nothing Else

2009-05-07T02:29:00.001-04:00

How do you say “F-ing Lakers”? Fakers! They are fakers, and they fake all the time. Yes maybe you get championships, you get rings, you get fans, and you get money, but you are from top to bottom losers in life.

If I were RA, I would say “F refs, F Fakers!”, no matter if I got fined by that Vice President Mr. Stu-pid Jackson. You hear me? You ARE Stupid! Of course you want the Fakers win, because you suck, and they suck. They suck so hard that you have to suck their asses for them.

I know sports is for communication, for peace; basketball is for education, but I don’t care tonight. All I see is hostility and f-ing losers.

And Yao, he does not belong to such a game, such hostility. He was lost. They game was destined to go Fakers’ way when the refs went out of minds. You know what Ron, you should just slam that raper in the face, HARD!!! Next time, do make sure to invite the other Jackson of Golden State to come, in case you need him. You have been to the crowd before, right?

Then Mr. Stu-pid again, D Fisher will miss the next game if I get it straight. That was a flagrant 2, am I right or not?

And, WHAT DA HELL HAPPENED TO VON WAFER??? What were you doing RA???

Ron Artest Quote of the Day

2009-05-06T21:16:00.001-04:00

"I think I’m the best. I know I’m not. But I think I am."

……

Artest is everybody's go-to man for a juicy quote this series, but the Houston forward is starting to recognize when he's being baited.

Reporter: "Do you feel like you’re the better team?"

Artest: "That’s a hard question because I always feel like I’m embarrassing when [I brag] but if you ask me a question like that I’m always going to give a confident, arrogant offer.

"I think I’m the best. I know I’m not. But I think I am."

……

This guy is actually much smarter than you would have thought.

Game and Everything Else

2009-05-05T16:04:00.001-04:00

Tmac1335 wrote:

I almost had tears in my eyes when they showed Yao told Jones that he wanted to come back and play. Truly a warrior!

-- Reader comment on Houston Chronicle

先拿这个撑个场面。我听苏群在解说的时候好像有点激动，他还说“浙江杭州的一个观众发短信来说，就一句话，竟然真的发生了。”我就在想，是不是阵雨，风格很像。后来听巴克利评论，我发现他调戏Kenny的时候很像Cartman在喊， “Kenny! Your family’s poor! Kenny! GET UP!!”

那天看了草皮写的日记我惭愧了，为什么你们写的就是“天街小雨润如酥”的，我写出来的就是“一片两片三四片，五片六片七八片”的，看的我觉得片字都不像个字了，越看越不像

有些“说别的没用”的话我不想说，说了也只是自娱自乐。Rudy能说“Never underestimate the heart of a champion”，布什能把他改成 “Never misunderestimate the heart of a champion”，我改不出来，布什的本事已经到很高的境界了。

要操心的事情其实很多，阿扁又要加民进党了，64二十年了不知道会发生什么，印度人又要做10美元不是电脑的电脑了，Android现在连名字都不能用了，台湾人说我们也要生病的，要进去当观察员，而且听说现在连猪，不光会飞，还会生病感冒了。

要做的事情其实也很多，简历还没改好，昨天又没有投，也没有地方投，学校里那两个死老头又催着我做事了，期末又要来了，什么书都还没看，我说我忙着呢，一个一个来，让我先把索马里那旮瘩的事解决了，谁知道还没解决完这边克莱斯勒又破产了。我说，能不能让我消停会？

Damn!

Charles Barkley Funny Quotes

2009-05-02T02:51:00.001-04:00

I don't care what people think. people are stupid.

I love New York City; I've got a gun.

I'm not a role model... Just because I dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids.
Somebody hits me, I'm going to hit him back. Even if it does look like he hasn't eaten in a while.

Kids are great. That's one of the best things about our business, all the kids you get to meet. It's a shame they have to grow up to be regular people and come to the games and call you names.

My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character.

Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel is a train.

These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.

Poor black people are in great shape. Black people use duct tape for everything. You break a chair, use duct tape. Your pants rip, use duct tape. You tear your ACL, use duct tape!

We don't need refs, but I guess white guys need something to do.

You know it's going to hell when the best rapper out there is white and the best golfer is black.

Any time something bad happens to a black person because of racism, I feel it in my soul. I really do. You take the Abner Louima case. That let me know one thing: If some white guys wanted to stick a plunger up a black guy's butt, and I'm the black guy who happened to be around, I'd have a plunger up my butt.

How long do you think Steve Nash spent on his hair? 5 seconds? 10 seconds?

I've been rich and poor. Being rich is better

I can't believe we're talking about high school guys being good in the NBA when they average six points a game. I could do that right now, and I ain't touched a basketball in a couple of months

I'm just what America needs - another unemployed black man.

when I was recruited at Auburn [university], they took me to a strip joint. When I saw those titties on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met my academic requirements

"This is my schedule: I wake up in the morning, decide where to play golf and drink beer all day"

"It's my big fat ass vs. their skinny legs. It's basic physics"

新青年制造

2009-05-02T02:11:00.001-04:00

在听雪村的湖南玛丽突然想起他原来给杭州哪个电视台写的歌，叫新青年制造什么的，反正蛮奇怪的，放上来听听，就嘎

Forever Young

2009-04-30T00:04:00.001-04:00

很久以前，听说有小孩唱 “We Will Rock You”，搜了以后百度上的名字是 “好听到吃屎都觉得香“，想想这是什么形容。。。但是不管怎么说，这些歌的中文翻译让我忍不住要去听，”摇滚童话“，挺符合我的想象的，其实草皮那些童话也挺摇滚的，就是正常儿童看不懂的童话，就跟我（或者我们，就是要包括阿超的意思）听的歌一样，正常人是不会听的。

其实我就是个weirdo，哪有人好好手没断偏要学用左手写字的；哪有人好好说话的时候突然讲不好笑的笑话的；哪有人看Peter Pan会看哭的（他妈的，不是我！）

反正就这么回事了，能干干着不能干看着，凑活吧

Let's dance in style, lets dance for a while
Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies
Hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Are you going to drop the bomb or not?
Let us die young or let us live forever
We don't have the power but we never say never
Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip
The music's for the sad men
Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders we're getting in tune
The music's played by the madman
Forever young, i want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever forever
Forever young, i want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever
Forever young
Some are like water, some are like the heat
Some are a melody and some are the beat
Sooner or later they all will be gone
Why don't they stay young
It's so hard to get old without a cause
I don't want to perish like a fading horse
Youth is like diamonds in the sun
And diamonds are forever
So many adventures couldn't happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams are swinging out of the blue
We let them come true
Forever young, i want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever forever
Forever young, i want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever forever forever
Forever young, i want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever forever
Forever young, i want to be forever

It’s C-Webb

2009-04-26T18:55:00.001-04:00

(Quote)

Hi, Zach (ZachZych).

Chris Webber (NBATVChris) is now following your updates on Twitter.

Check out Chris Webber's profile here:
http://twitter.com/NBATVChris

Best,
Twitter

(Quote)

Deke Postgame

2009-04-24T02:39:00.001-04:00

Mutombo says career over after suffering Game 2 knee injury

2009-04-22T12:09:00.001-04:00

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) -- Houston Rockets center Dikembe Mutombo said his lengthy career is finished after a knee injury knocked him out of the Rockets' playoff game Tuesday night against the Trail Blazers.

"For me, basketball is over," he said.

Mutombo, an 18-year NBA veteran, appeared to get tangled with Portland center Greg Oden and came down hard on his left leg late in the first quarter of Game 2 and did not return.

He stayed prone on the court under the Blazers' basket for several moments before he was taken away by stretcher. A preliminary examination revealed a knee strain.

Afterward in Houston's locker room, the 7-foot-2 veteran was on crutches and fighting back tears.

"Nobody ever thought they'd be carrying the big guy out like a wounded soldier," he said.

Mutombo, the league's oldest player at 42, will be examined by doctors in Houston on Wednesday.

"Dikembe is one of the statesmen of this league," teammate Shane Battier said. "There's not a better guy. To see him in pain is tough to see. He cares so much about this game that he doesn't want to end his career like that. That's the tragedy of it, too."

Mutombo is an eight-time All-Star who won the NBA's Defensive Player of the Year award four times and stands in second on the NBA's career blocks list with 3,289. He has played for Denver, Atlanta, Philadelphia, New Jersey, New York and Houston.

In 1,196 career games, Mutombo has averaged 9.8 points, 10.3 rebounds and 2.7 blocks.

Moreover, Mutombo is known for his humanitarian work. He founded the Dikembe Mutombo Foundation in 1997 to benefit the people of his homeland of Kinshasha in the Congo. In 2007, he opened the Biamba Marie Mutombo Hospital and Research Center there, named after his mother.

The Rockets re-signed Mutombo in December after he played in 39 games with the team the previous season. He was a free agent and had considered retirement.

He played in nine regular-season games with the Rockets, averaging 1.8 points, 3.7 rebounds and 1.22 blocks.

Mutombo played 18 minutes in Game 1 of the series and had nine rebounds. The Rockets won the opener, 108-81, before the Blazers evened the series with a 107-103 victory on Tuesday.

"I've had a wonderful 18 years of staying injury-free, so I just want to go out with my head up, no regrets," he said.

Where do we go now?

2009-04-22T01:40:00.001-04:00

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Some Q&A with Jon Feigen

2009-04-19T23:27:00.001-04:00

“Jonathan,
What was the crowd like at Portland at halftime? I thought we played one hell of a game!! It looked like we were focused all the time and finally we saw the killer mentality of the Rockets....Lets hope they keep it rolling. Get Red and Rowdy!!”
(Their crowd is great, but extremely whiny. In the NBA, the fewer professional teams in the city, the more the crowd blames the officials. -- Jonathan)

thats what im talking about
– This dude must be black, plain and simple, just like what he said.

“What was the crowd chanting in the 4th?
It was inaudible on TV....”
('These refs suck.' -- Jonathan)

“Hi Jonathan,
After all of last week's worries about meeting Utah in the playoff, probably all Rockets' fans will be thrilled if this series does happen this year, wouldn't you agree?”
(Yes, I think Rockets fans would be thrilled to reach the second round and not have the Lakers waiting. -- Jonathan)

“Greg, since you will be at the game on Tues. Dude you should wear a rockets joursey and take a broom to the stadium with you...that would be funny!”

又过了一个冬天又过了一个夏天

2009-04-17T09:26:00.002-04:00

单位的H姐拿出一叠书让我看。新工作挺忙的，我一个人做好几个人的事情，但只拿一个人的工资。

大学班里某MM今年10月7日要结婚了。在她博客里看到她化妆穿婚纱拍婚纱照的样子。听说是高中时候在一起，就决定了要嫁给这个男人。后来大一那年寒假他在远方有了新女友。MM就这样了想了他四年等了他四年恨了他四年。临近MM毕业之时终于是回头要与她结婚修成正果。真是无限感慨。

哈利油

2009-04-16T23:21:00.001-04:00

”哈利油生来我最灵贩，掐（吃）了饭莫事颗（去）搓～麻～将～“

”哈利油我开了只洗脚城，地点就在金盆岭，金盆洗脚城，让你过‘足’瘾。”

”哈利油各几天不晓是何解，瞌睡一来嘎哒脑壳就做死各栽。“

”哈利油我今天高兴的要死，我堂客要我去看我岳父老子，……“

”哈利油诶. 你这个蠢包儿！你碰到我爸爸你就要请安呢！“

”哈利油接到两张请贴，结果自己冒搞得坨清，挨了两餐饱打“

”长沙市哈利油广播电台，短波二百五，中波不管三七二十一，调口味立体声，现在开始播音了。“

睡在我上铺的兄弟

2009-04-12T02:36:00.001-04:00

前两天一听到老狼那个声音出来就有很遥远的感觉，就是原来那种海底透不过气的感觉

听到他那个声音一下就想到那种传统的大学校园，比如我大一的时候去过的老校区，再加上CCTV5老是要放的那个OPPO广告，where 高圆圆在校园小路上回头一笑，总让人多想

大一的时候老是抱怨这个校园没大学的气氛，像高中，但是记得有一次去了工程（后来你们小朋友也它理工），一样的建筑，怎么就好像感觉有那么一点点意思，难怪他们总是说别人的东西总是好的

我算是想通了，大学的时间本来就不是用来珍惜用来学习用来干吗干吗的，大学就是毕业10年20年以后回忆用的。无他。

我记得这个歌好像那个时候在寝室里说起过的，我估计是阵雨说的，他老是听些比我还年纪大的歌

突然想起来，睡我上铺的好像就是阵雨，但是你也没分给我烟抽

其实也蛮奇怪的，不晓得算是个怎么回事。先是把阿超惹毛了，后来洛江洪又消失了，陈亮倒是老是看到他上网，就是很久没讲话过。今天空的时候看了一点friends，结果里面那两个人也吵架，还要搬走。当然结果还是和好了，弄的我惭愧兮兮的

草皮我写不出你那种看不懂的东西，但是觉得你挺神奇的，不知道你脑壳里的线路是怎么搭的。还有那个时候你怎么会想到晚上和我们出去打篮球的，怎么后来就再也没看你打过了

你不要往小贩的方向发展太多了，小贩是捣腾服装的，你还是争取当个范师傅，兼裁缝什么的

唉，烦银捏。。。

念慈啊,我在想...

2009-04-03T23:31:00.010-04:00

神器=米...

念慈,我弄了这东西..

2009-04-01T22:59:00.003-04:00

拿到就后悔了...还是那个有投影功能的好...

新的快乐

2009-04-01T20:35:00.000-04:00

当你准备舍弃一些东西的时候，你总会觉得它是好的，因为你要得不到了。但这放弃是必须做的，不丢掉老的哪来新的快乐呢。

2009.04.01

2009-04-01T08:49:00.000-04:00

广发第一天。
交接。
事情繁杂。头绪很多。
还有一些国际业务的东西要从头学起。
同事都要慢慢熟悉起来。
不能再怯场。
综合信贷部有两个帅哥。可为什么我只是想到你。